you have to document it. you know, this is my place. this little blog here is my space that i have been completely me in. i don't punctuate, capitalize or always use proper english protocol too often because i loose the excitement of my story telling ways if i have to take time to think about miss smith from third grade and how she would have wanted me to do it. putting pictures up would be helpful, and sometimes i do, but it mostly intimidates me. this space has been all about words for me. it has given some creative voice to that dominant right side brain of mine (left handedness rules!).
this leads me to acknowledge the immense happiness the relationships i have gained thru blogging have brought me. i have loved getting to know how the other side lives, even if it is seemingly ordinary and mundane.
this recent challenge i have been given has no doubt been hard, but the overwhelming kindness i have received has been so incredibly humbling. like that day when emily ballard showed up at my house with boxes full of costco happiness. it had been so long since i had trekked to costco and she knew just what to buy. and then she swooped in and took my kids for hours on end. hours on end. the strange part about all of this is that very rarely have i been able to lay down to get relief. having a panic attack in bed is an oxymoron, aching bones hurt when you lay on them, and heart flutters/palpitations get worse when you lay down. so, i was quite mystified as to what i should do while emily had my kids. scott ended up being home (a rare night) and for a few hours we talked and were still. we connected and talked about how hard this has been and how we are going to get thru it.
or how about when my friends, the ebbert's, decided to visit me for an entire day on their vacation where they had mounds of family to fit in and we got their whole first day plus a date night. we were greeted with a box full of sunshine and rainbows she put together for me. it included all kinds of brightly colored treats and a sweet note. their time with us helped me forget about the fact that i had had a migraine that morning and had to miss ella's first soccer game. i was able to glean from their goodness for a whole day and know that i am going to be okay. all is not lost.
or that time my mother took time out of her incredibly packed life to take my kids for me for the night. she took them to the park, to get slurpees, and to do all kinds of other grandma activities. she gave them that attention and love i have had to work harder to do the past few months.
or when my friend saren was at my house the other night and took me aside, looked me in the eye and told me that she had been worried about me and really praying for me. it was so deeply sincere and kind and i could feel that concern and compassion from her.
or when my cousin kalee drove all the way from provo with three little kids to visit me for the day. and how she didn't judge me when i pulled out a take and bake pizza for lunch. she talked to me all day and helped me relive our wonderful memories at yale that we shared together. and when she heard how much my little grayce loved to cooked, she sent her a cookbook in the mail that detailed 101 things to do with a cake mix. (our waistlines will never be the same!)
or that time when i opened my mailbox, and my friend kate sent me a family fun night box. it was filled with beautifully packaged ice cream sundae toppings, a sweet note, and a movie to watch as a family. because that was an over the top thoughtful thing to do for someone you have come to know better thru blogging, especially when she lives clear across the country. and we had a family fun night. let me tell you. and the whole time, i thought about how someone's deliberate kindness made that night a little more special. knowing that somebody took the time realize that when you are in survival mode, family fun nights are a little trickier to come by.
or the time when my cousin billie jean (i have always longed for a name that MJ sang about) in london sent me a sweet message about feeling better and how i have been in her prayers. she then proceeded to remind me of the long line of females in our family that have suffered for generations with thyroid dysfunction, migraines, blood disease, anxiety, auto immune disorders, and arthritis. i think of my dad's grandma who was in bed for 18 years with thyroid disorders, migraines, and arthritis. i was overwhelmed with that thought today. 18 years. modern medicine has come so far, as has the age of information. at my fingertips i can research all kinds of things and pray for guidance that i can know what to do to be a functioning mother again. and thru finding a few things and sharing that info, get overwhelming emails from others saying that they have been on the same path and think this might help them as well.
at the end of the day, i have come to realize with this and so many other things in life, that a very kind and loving heavenly father drives that car of life if we let him. sometimes i try to backseat drive. i try to do everything to control the situation and to control the outcome. the truth is, i can twist myself up in knots trying to control my life, that action heeds no progress. the progress is achieved when i take my proper seat in the car, realizing that i can't control a lot of things or feel guilty about them ( i often times try to convince myself that i did something or ate something to cause my health problems). i have to realize that even if i try to grab the wheel when i see that car of life going somewhere i don't like, it won't change the course, it will only change the ride i take. and you know, i want a good ride. i want a ride where i can enjoy where i travel, and what i see out my window. i don't want to become obsessed that the inside of the car is less than appealing or old, but that the car is taking me where i need to be with a really amazing driver and some pretty amazing stops and passengers along the way.
Friday, August 31, 2012
Wednesday, August 29, 2012
my heart hurts
when school starts. we work so darn hard to build those summer relationships and then poof - all gone! school starts and our time together is reduced and turned into routine and balance. i sure love summer nights looking at stars, and lazy mornings with cartoons and late bowls of cereal . it's all necessary but so sad.
today ella started kindergarten. she was thrilled and i was that parent holding back the tears. she has needed me so much that i was just resigned to being her sidekick for life. it was a startling thought that the county wanted her for a few hours everyday and there was nothing i could do about it. sigh. she was thrilled to walk into that classroom and had the displeasure of lugging me behind. she could have gone in by herself and been fine.
there was a sparkle in her eye that was so confident and so ready. she is ready. it's what i keep repeating today every time those tears welled up.
also, while all things random might as well come up - i think this article changed my health. i am not joking one ounce. and it actually started with this article i found on pinterest that lead me to it. i have been diligent about researching every single darn aspect of thyroid dysfunction as i am pretty convinced that this and some hormonal issues have been my problem. i have found great success with the magnesium oil. it is itchy at first, but my heart flutters, palpitations, and chest pains were gone the first few applications. also, i was having at least one panic attack each day (over nothing, just suddenly feeling like i couldn't breath and crazy nervous), those dissipated the first few days i started using it. i use the magnesium powder throughout the day in a huge cup of water that i sip on. i have found i have to really, really dilute mine. i can now wait 3-4 hours in between meals and have been able to keep a steady weight. my metabolism had gone into overtime and i was eating enough for my entire family all before breakfast and losing weight. it was disturbing on many levels.
the best part of this find is the amazing sleep. i was sleeping for 7-8 hours but waking up every half hour or so. since i started using all of these, i am sleeping a solid 6-8 hours and wide awake when i do come to. i experimented with scott, having him take a drink before bed of the powder. the nights we didn't use it, he tossed and turned all night. i think i just may have convinced my western medicine husband of something alternative, maybe......only maybe. also, i have been using this supplement as i have had migraines weekly since they put the nexplanon rod in my arm. i have still been having weekly migraines, but the endurance has been cut in half. like saturday for instance, ella had an early soccer game. half-way thru getting ready i noticed that i couldn't see myself in the mirror anymore. pretty soon the black lights came on and i was running for a fiorocet to lessen the blow. in about 45 minutes my vision was back and the head pain was gone. i only suffered migraine hangover for a few hours. no slurred speech, numb limbs or porcelin throne worshipping.
i thought i would pass on this info as something that has helped me get back to "a new normal". i have grocery shopped without a day to recover for almost a month, been able to keep up with a normal cleaning schedule and make dinner more consistently. this is progress and i am feeling like i might almost be up for a trip to my favorite city this fall. my fingers are crossed, nyc baby!
today ella started kindergarten. she was thrilled and i was that parent holding back the tears. she has needed me so much that i was just resigned to being her sidekick for life. it was a startling thought that the county wanted her for a few hours everyday and there was nothing i could do about it. sigh. she was thrilled to walk into that classroom and had the displeasure of lugging me behind. she could have gone in by herself and been fine.
there was a sparkle in her eye that was so confident and so ready. she is ready. it's what i keep repeating today every time those tears welled up.
also, while all things random might as well come up - i think this article changed my health. i am not joking one ounce. and it actually started with this article i found on pinterest that lead me to it. i have been diligent about researching every single darn aspect of thyroid dysfunction as i am pretty convinced that this and some hormonal issues have been my problem. i have found great success with the magnesium oil. it is itchy at first, but my heart flutters, palpitations, and chest pains were gone the first few applications. also, i was having at least one panic attack each day (over nothing, just suddenly feeling like i couldn't breath and crazy nervous), those dissipated the first few days i started using it. i use the magnesium powder throughout the day in a huge cup of water that i sip on. i have found i have to really, really dilute mine. i can now wait 3-4 hours in between meals and have been able to keep a steady weight. my metabolism had gone into overtime and i was eating enough for my entire family all before breakfast and losing weight. it was disturbing on many levels.
the best part of this find is the amazing sleep. i was sleeping for 7-8 hours but waking up every half hour or so. since i started using all of these, i am sleeping a solid 6-8 hours and wide awake when i do come to. i experimented with scott, having him take a drink before bed of the powder. the nights we didn't use it, he tossed and turned all night. i think i just may have convinced my western medicine husband of something alternative, maybe......only maybe. also, i have been using this supplement as i have had migraines weekly since they put the nexplanon rod in my arm. i have still been having weekly migraines, but the endurance has been cut in half. like saturday for instance, ella had an early soccer game. half-way thru getting ready i noticed that i couldn't see myself in the mirror anymore. pretty soon the black lights came on and i was running for a fiorocet to lessen the blow. in about 45 minutes my vision was back and the head pain was gone. i only suffered migraine hangover for a few hours. no slurred speech, numb limbs or porcelin throne worshipping.
i thought i would pass on this info as something that has helped me get back to "a new normal". i have grocery shopped without a day to recover for almost a month, been able to keep up with a normal cleaning schedule and make dinner more consistently. this is progress and i am feeling like i might almost be up for a trip to my favorite city this fall. my fingers are crossed, nyc baby!
Friday, August 10, 2012
my retirement plan
as i have mentioned here previously, my 3rd child has had an official status change from hella to ella. once we eliminated milk and a few other things from her diet, her fussiness has changed substantially. we have made some other good strides in the health department with her and feel like things are getting under control. (no morning vomit sessions since march, this is a record for us) anyway. it has been like watching a summer blockbuster as her impulse control has gotten so much better. we have seen this person emerge and i'm telling you what, i have no need to invest in anything but her for retirement.
she has discovered the joy of earning a dollar. her favorite thing to do is jobs. i was not paying up to her standards and soon she flew the coop on any extra job i could offer her and took to the streets. well, the sidewalks really. and if i was being truly honest, it started with doors. she took to the neighbors doors. selling. selling anything she could pack in to the old red wagon i rescued from my grandparents house. at first it was rocks gently bathed in fresh picked grass. she had to learn her selling points quick and also, her negotiating skills. for the month of june, she trudged up and down the cul-de-sac with her wagon of rocks and grass, pointing out all of the strong points a rock has to offer. when asked how much it cost she would reply for free or for a quarter.
after many a jar full of quarters, she took to pictures. drawing all day long, getting her inventory volumes up high enough to cover the refrigerators of the whole neighborhood. after this venture, i had to squash the door to door solicitation. you can sell from the sidewalk only was the newly implemented strategy. i personally was hoping the city wasn't driving by too often because for sure they would make us get a home business license. apparently she is hard to resist.
my kids jumped on the duct tape bandwagon. quick, fast. and the flower duct tape pen soon consumed summer days and the selling took over summer nights. orders were placed and soon there was a wait list for the duct tape inventory. ella took her sisters lead and became the head salesman. while grayce bustled away making the "flowers" ella took to yelling in the streets, peddling the inventory.
her voice is something not to be missed. as in it's impossible to miss the demand in her voice. one evening some good women came to visit and wish me happy birthday thoughts. the visit was soon interrupted by a voice outside. "for your motha, for your fatha, for your sista. buy a ring now!" over and over at the top of her large lungs were things shouted with enthusiasm. the yelling grew so loud, the visit came to a halt and we all had tears running down our faces we were laughing so hard. she was all alone out there, an umbrella over her head and a nifty red table just her size with all of her prized inventory before her, and a small chair to rest her bones on. after the shouting continued for the better part of an hour, soon we had a line of cars waiting for a duct tape flower. she had quarters coming out her ears.
in between each venture, we had to set rules and boundaries. five dollars for a rock probably won't heed much income dear, you need to have reasonable prices. so she decided to have a line set when asked about pricing - for free or for a dollar. that has become her price. for anything. for the rings she made out of toilet paper last week, the duct tape "puppet" she made to sell, and the strange looking weapons she made from duct tape that she claimed were jewelry ( i swear they were "brass knuckles" duct tape style).
we headed to the utah favorite bear lake for a week of relaxation at a fabulous beach house one of scott's colleagues generously offered us. once we hit the beach and she saw the swarms of people on the beach, she was so sad we hadn't brought duct tape, lemonade or anything to sell. look at all the people she was exclaiming. what a missed opportunity!! i told her we were on a vacation, we didn't need to work, there was plenty of that at home.
a few days in to our vacation, she took to the beach looking for valuable shells. she was on that beach from morning to evening. quickly making friends with the neighbors and everyone parked around our beach station. she was scouring for big shells, lizards, anything to make a buck. one day i was helping her in the bathroom when she took note of some lovely seashells on the back of the toilet. think pottery barn, urban outfitters, z gallerie for this beach house, unreal. something you would see on tv but never dream of being able to stay in. she caressed and obsessed over these shells, wondering if they had gathered those from the beach. on our drive home, a horrified older sister made an accusation that made these experienced parents laugh silly. "ella, you did NOT find that shell on the beach!!!" the shell had been neatly tucked away in her pocket, her pining heart now satisfied. she had a shell the size of her hand, and oh what money that would bring!!! now of course we laughed when she wasn't looking so she knew the serious nature of thievery. when she was told she needed to go up with dad to his office and take the shell back and apologize, a bit of an anxiety attack came on. she turned red and couldn't breath, she was screaming and pleading protest. gratefully, this was not our first child with an unattainable expectation level hanging over her head and we were able to compromise. she would let dad take the shell to work with him, and she would write her very best i'm sorry card and promise to never commit acts of theft ever again.
she is so determined. her life is a blur, she wakes up with plans, goes to bed with plans. the world is right in her little palm. she was at primary children's the other day (for her stomach) and the dr. was asking her about herself and her family. the conversation was beyond hilarious. she had no idea the ages of her siblings or when their birthdays were, no idea what they liked to do and frankly, it took prodding for her to tell dr. patel their names. and it hit me - here is my retirement plan. this is what a successful CEO must have. crazy drive with the whatever it takes to fire and hire people, the focus to get things done, and the energy that three healthy people have, but not a care in the world about people's details that don't concern her!
she has discovered the joy of earning a dollar. her favorite thing to do is jobs. i was not paying up to her standards and soon she flew the coop on any extra job i could offer her and took to the streets. well, the sidewalks really. and if i was being truly honest, it started with doors. she took to the neighbors doors. selling. selling anything she could pack in to the old red wagon i rescued from my grandparents house. at first it was rocks gently bathed in fresh picked grass. she had to learn her selling points quick and also, her negotiating skills. for the month of june, she trudged up and down the cul-de-sac with her wagon of rocks and grass, pointing out all of the strong points a rock has to offer. when asked how much it cost she would reply for free or for a quarter.
after many a jar full of quarters, she took to pictures. drawing all day long, getting her inventory volumes up high enough to cover the refrigerators of the whole neighborhood. after this venture, i had to squash the door to door solicitation. you can sell from the sidewalk only was the newly implemented strategy. i personally was hoping the city wasn't driving by too often because for sure they would make us get a home business license. apparently she is hard to resist.
my kids jumped on the duct tape bandwagon. quick, fast. and the flower duct tape pen soon consumed summer days and the selling took over summer nights. orders were placed and soon there was a wait list for the duct tape inventory. ella took her sisters lead and became the head salesman. while grayce bustled away making the "flowers" ella took to yelling in the streets, peddling the inventory.
her voice is something not to be missed. as in it's impossible to miss the demand in her voice. one evening some good women came to visit and wish me happy birthday thoughts. the visit was soon interrupted by a voice outside. "for your motha, for your fatha, for your sista. buy a ring now!" over and over at the top of her large lungs were things shouted with enthusiasm. the yelling grew so loud, the visit came to a halt and we all had tears running down our faces we were laughing so hard. she was all alone out there, an umbrella over her head and a nifty red table just her size with all of her prized inventory before her, and a small chair to rest her bones on. after the shouting continued for the better part of an hour, soon we had a line of cars waiting for a duct tape flower. she had quarters coming out her ears.
in between each venture, we had to set rules and boundaries. five dollars for a rock probably won't heed much income dear, you need to have reasonable prices. so she decided to have a line set when asked about pricing - for free or for a dollar. that has become her price. for anything. for the rings she made out of toilet paper last week, the duct tape "puppet" she made to sell, and the strange looking weapons she made from duct tape that she claimed were jewelry ( i swear they were "brass knuckles" duct tape style).
a few days in to our vacation, she took to the beach looking for valuable shells. she was on that beach from morning to evening. quickly making friends with the neighbors and everyone parked around our beach station. she was scouring for big shells, lizards, anything to make a buck. one day i was helping her in the bathroom when she took note of some lovely seashells on the back of the toilet. think pottery barn, urban outfitters, z gallerie for this beach house, unreal. something you would see on tv but never dream of being able to stay in. she caressed and obsessed over these shells, wondering if they had gathered those from the beach. on our drive home, a horrified older sister made an accusation that made these experienced parents laugh silly. "ella, you did NOT find that shell on the beach!!!" the shell had been neatly tucked away in her pocket, her pining heart now satisfied. she had a shell the size of her hand, and oh what money that would bring!!! now of course we laughed when she wasn't looking so she knew the serious nature of thievery. when she was told she needed to go up with dad to his office and take the shell back and apologize, a bit of an anxiety attack came on. she turned red and couldn't breath, she was screaming and pleading protest. gratefully, this was not our first child with an unattainable expectation level hanging over her head and we were able to compromise. she would let dad take the shell to work with him, and she would write her very best i'm sorry card and promise to never commit acts of theft ever again.
she is so determined. her life is a blur, she wakes up with plans, goes to bed with plans. the world is right in her little palm. she was at primary children's the other day (for her stomach) and the dr. was asking her about herself and her family. the conversation was beyond hilarious. she had no idea the ages of her siblings or when their birthdays were, no idea what they liked to do and frankly, it took prodding for her to tell dr. patel their names. and it hit me - here is my retirement plan. this is what a successful CEO must have. crazy drive with the whatever it takes to fire and hire people, the focus to get things done, and the energy that three healthy people have, but not a care in the world about people's details that don't concern her!
Sunday, July 15, 2012
the wonder a little time provides
i sat at the allergist office on tuesday full of curiosity and anticipation. skin testing, they told me, was a part of the visit. it was a visit for rowan. i thought back to only six months previous, sitting in the same office with this tragically sick little boy. we had been referred to the allergist by our pediatrician after a good amount of hives came after a small bite of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. that coupled with chronic diarrhea and covered in dry awful skin rashes he thought it would be a good idea to get some attention by a specialist.
the first day we went had been scheduled for months, and when it finally arrived, rowan was in the clutches of a miserable stomach bug. he was dehydrated, tired, and miserable. they sent me for blood work to determine how severe the allergies were. i was also given some great tips for the miserable eczema covering his body all the time. (1/2 c of table salt in the tub, who knew?!?!?!) it was a visit that makes me cringe every time i think about it.
everyone around us was aware of his chronic misery. someone referred us to a local chiropractor who dealt with food allergies, no adjustments, using the NAET system. i was incredibly skeptical. so was my western medicine husband. so was my western medicine husband. so was my, well, you get the idea. leaving the allergist's office that first day i was disheartened knowing that the blood work would do nothing but help us eliminate food. a life of elimination. when we got the blood work back the allergies were so extensive that his diet was essentially fruit, vegetables, rice milk and meat. no wheat, milk, peanuts, eggs, pistachios, pine nuts, or soy. i felt backed into a corner. in desperation, i vowed to try this vodoo knowing it couldn't hurt. i heard miracle stories with this system, people who were deathly allergic to peanuts now ate them everyday, ADHD suffers cured, celiacs no more.
we gave it a go. it is rough, eliminating foods for 25 hours after being hooked to a napoleon dynamite time machine to tell what allergies you have. amazingly, the test results the chiropractor gave me were the same as the results from the blood work. for multiple visits, we went in for this crazy, hokey system. crazy, hokey. three times a week for months.
i am proud to report that after doing the skin tests yesterday, we were told my son could eat peanuts. the skin test showed no measurable allergic reaction to anything his blood work showed. nothing. there were two small skiffs to peanuts and pine nuts. nothing of note she said. we are on a slow integration plan to reintroduce all of these things with an epi pen close by. he is a different boy. six months ago, he was chronically miserable, bouts of diarrhea all day, bleeding and cracked eczema covering his body. he had no interest in food and trying to get him to drink was torture. his weight was falling off the charts and he was chronically sick. today, his personality shines. he waves at strangers, makes his way to strangers benches during sacrament so visit, EATS THINGS CONTAINING MILK WITH NO STOMACH AGONY, snuck into his sisters room and ate a snickers with no trace of hives or breathing difficulties. has crackers without a bleeding, cracked rash. eats a scrambled egg without diarrhea for a week.
as i walked out of the office, not having to schedule another visit, i thought about what a difference 6 months makes. i feel incredibly grateful that i took a chance on something out of the norm. it has literally changed the way our family works and also, it has saved my sanity. i applied it to my own health, knowing that in six months, my life just might resemble normal and i got a tingly feeling inside. after that little experience, i have re-evaluated all that i am doing to get better. it seems like it is a ripple effect of things prescribed that are supposed to be helping my that are making my life miserable. the rod in my arm is supposed to help within 5-6 months, but then i started a visit from aunt flo that has lasted 5 weeks, courtesy of the nexplanon rod. so ibuprofen was recommended to help slow me down. even though i warned that it wreaks havoc on my stomach no matter how much food i eat, i had to do that before they would give estrogen to slow me down. the ibuprofen (200 mg) once daily killed me and now i am dealing with a miserable reflux stomach that causes some rotten nights and feeding times. once they finally gave me the estrogen, it has caused miserable migraine symptoms, all. the. time. done. i am done. i am going off all the garbage and listening to what my body tells me. we get so involved in prescribing sometimes that it is forgotten how miserable the side effects can be. and the anxiety. i can't even give sufficient credit to the anxiety. scott was gone for three days on the pioneer trek with no cell phone service and i thought they were going to have to admit me. the anxiety that all of the side effects are causing is putting me into a straight jacket, literally and figuratively. it is rotten to live life wondering how sick you are going to be when you wake up. and for the record, i have tried natural methods. i have tried chiropractors, a natural hormone clinic, vitamins for regulation of hormones, natural thyroid booster. i guess it takes time to get better and time is something i can do, i have no choice.!.
i have had multiple priesthood blessings and they all contain they same phrase about "time to heal" and "with time my body will return to normal". time requires patience and patience recognizes gethsemane where this pain was already born. this misery is an opportunity to make personal for me the most crucial moment in history, the atonement. thru the atonement of jesus christ we are made whole. it is a daily process that refines. i am grateful for it, truly. i have had to accept help with humility that i didn't know i possessed. but sometimes, a body can't maintain 4 kids and go and get the milk and bread you have been out of for 5 days. you have to humble yourself and accept when someone able bodied can do it for you. patience is a virtue and by darn, one that i am going to have whether i like it or not........
the first day we went had been scheduled for months, and when it finally arrived, rowan was in the clutches of a miserable stomach bug. he was dehydrated, tired, and miserable. they sent me for blood work to determine how severe the allergies were. i was also given some great tips for the miserable eczema covering his body all the time. (1/2 c of table salt in the tub, who knew?!?!?!) it was a visit that makes me cringe every time i think about it.
everyone around us was aware of his chronic misery. someone referred us to a local chiropractor who dealt with food allergies, no adjustments, using the NAET system. i was incredibly skeptical. so was my western medicine husband. so was my western medicine husband. so was my, well, you get the idea. leaving the allergist's office that first day i was disheartened knowing that the blood work would do nothing but help us eliminate food. a life of elimination. when we got the blood work back the allergies were so extensive that his diet was essentially fruit, vegetables, rice milk and meat. no wheat, milk, peanuts, eggs, pistachios, pine nuts, or soy. i felt backed into a corner. in desperation, i vowed to try this vodoo knowing it couldn't hurt. i heard miracle stories with this system, people who were deathly allergic to peanuts now ate them everyday, ADHD suffers cured, celiacs no more.
we gave it a go. it is rough, eliminating foods for 25 hours after being hooked to a napoleon dynamite time machine to tell what allergies you have. amazingly, the test results the chiropractor gave me were the same as the results from the blood work. for multiple visits, we went in for this crazy, hokey system. crazy, hokey. three times a week for months.
i am proud to report that after doing the skin tests yesterday, we were told my son could eat peanuts. the skin test showed no measurable allergic reaction to anything his blood work showed. nothing. there were two small skiffs to peanuts and pine nuts. nothing of note she said. we are on a slow integration plan to reintroduce all of these things with an epi pen close by. he is a different boy. six months ago, he was chronically miserable, bouts of diarrhea all day, bleeding and cracked eczema covering his body. he had no interest in food and trying to get him to drink was torture. his weight was falling off the charts and he was chronically sick. today, his personality shines. he waves at strangers, makes his way to strangers benches during sacrament so visit, EATS THINGS CONTAINING MILK WITH NO STOMACH AGONY, snuck into his sisters room and ate a snickers with no trace of hives or breathing difficulties. has crackers without a bleeding, cracked rash. eats a scrambled egg without diarrhea for a week.
as i walked out of the office, not having to schedule another visit, i thought about what a difference 6 months makes. i feel incredibly grateful that i took a chance on something out of the norm. it has literally changed the way our family works and also, it has saved my sanity. i applied it to my own health, knowing that in six months, my life just might resemble normal and i got a tingly feeling inside. after that little experience, i have re-evaluated all that i am doing to get better. it seems like it is a ripple effect of things prescribed that are supposed to be helping my that are making my life miserable. the rod in my arm is supposed to help within 5-6 months, but then i started a visit from aunt flo that has lasted 5 weeks, courtesy of the nexplanon rod. so ibuprofen was recommended to help slow me down. even though i warned that it wreaks havoc on my stomach no matter how much food i eat, i had to do that before they would give estrogen to slow me down. the ibuprofen (200 mg) once daily killed me and now i am dealing with a miserable reflux stomach that causes some rotten nights and feeding times. once they finally gave me the estrogen, it has caused miserable migraine symptoms, all. the. time. done. i am done. i am going off all the garbage and listening to what my body tells me. we get so involved in prescribing sometimes that it is forgotten how miserable the side effects can be. and the anxiety. i can't even give sufficient credit to the anxiety. scott was gone for three days on the pioneer trek with no cell phone service and i thought they were going to have to admit me. the anxiety that all of the side effects are causing is putting me into a straight jacket, literally and figuratively. it is rotten to live life wondering how sick you are going to be when you wake up. and for the record, i have tried natural methods. i have tried chiropractors, a natural hormone clinic, vitamins for regulation of hormones, natural thyroid booster. i guess it takes time to get better and time is something i can do, i have no choice.!.
i have had multiple priesthood blessings and they all contain they same phrase about "time to heal" and "with time my body will return to normal". time requires patience and patience recognizes gethsemane where this pain was already born. this misery is an opportunity to make personal for me the most crucial moment in history, the atonement. thru the atonement of jesus christ we are made whole. it is a daily process that refines. i am grateful for it, truly. i have had to accept help with humility that i didn't know i possessed. but sometimes, a body can't maintain 4 kids and go and get the milk and bread you have been out of for 5 days. you have to humble yourself and accept when someone able bodied can do it for you. patience is a virtue and by darn, one that i am going to have whether i like it or not........
Friday, July 6, 2012
i love how strong we are
that was the first line in the card scott gave me this morning.
because i have been incredibly emotional lately, i had to take a few minutes to gather myself and read the rest of the card. it was one of those cards that was written just for us. it was very sweet and tender. i have thought about these years we have spent together, taking life on. what a wonderful ride we are one. what challenges and opportunities we have faced. i love that red head. these last few months especially, have seemed to be incredibly challenging. scott has been there for me and pulled the extra slack my poor health has left in its wake. he is kind, patient and the best part about him is how easily he forgets. while i'm not talking about the year he forgot our anniversary (i was never upset about it, we were moving across the country and he was on 48 hour OB/GYN rotations) i'm talking about what used to drive me nuts early on in our marriage that i have now come to appreciate.
early on in our marriage, he tried hard to pay attention to the 1,244,355 details i would give him on a daily basis that only a woman can give, but when asked for specific recall, he usually failed miserably. he couldn't recall many details of childhood and often couldn't remember why so and so was bugging me because of the list of injustices they had caused me. my immature self did not appreciate this angel like quality, yet i have always been drawn to his kindness and compassion to every person he meets.
this year i have realized to a great magnitude why our marriage works so well. it's because he forgets. he doesn't remember when i ruined dinner, or when i wasted money on something he saw as silly. he doesn't remember when someone wronged him, or made a cruel joke at his expense. he forgets when the kids act out and misbehave. every second of his life is lived with this renewal, or better yet, a fresh start. there are no bad things in his world. nothing bad that can't be forgotten and started fresh and clean. how i admire and love that about him. it has been such an anchor for me to watch and admire thru these many years. he lives life with no grudges and what a wonderful life he lives.
he has given me a large amount of optimism the past few months, never loosing sight of important things. there have been many tears of frustration, exhaustion, and anxiety on my part, and he has been ever stalwart with kind hopeful words. how i love him. i love our life. and when a man as good as that eyes a jeep for a very long time, why, you say happy anniversary dear! and you watch with a thrill as he bounces around in his new (to him) jeep, dreaming of many summer nights with the top off and hair flying around. i told him to throw practicality out the door, and for once, do something wonderful for himself. while it took an awful lot of convincing, tonight, we are heading to a japanese fusion restaurant, riding in that jeep of his. oh, how good it is to be married to a man who forgets...
because i have been incredibly emotional lately, i had to take a few minutes to gather myself and read the rest of the card. it was one of those cards that was written just for us. it was very sweet and tender. i have thought about these years we have spent together, taking life on. what a wonderful ride we are one. what challenges and opportunities we have faced. i love that red head. these last few months especially, have seemed to be incredibly challenging. scott has been there for me and pulled the extra slack my poor health has left in its wake. he is kind, patient and the best part about him is how easily he forgets. while i'm not talking about the year he forgot our anniversary (i was never upset about it, we were moving across the country and he was on 48 hour OB/GYN rotations) i'm talking about what used to drive me nuts early on in our marriage that i have now come to appreciate.
early on in our marriage, he tried hard to pay attention to the 1,244,355 details i would give him on a daily basis that only a woman can give, but when asked for specific recall, he usually failed miserably. he couldn't recall many details of childhood and often couldn't remember why so and so was bugging me because of the list of injustices they had caused me. my immature self did not appreciate this angel like quality, yet i have always been drawn to his kindness and compassion to every person he meets.
this year i have realized to a great magnitude why our marriage works so well. it's because he forgets. he doesn't remember when i ruined dinner, or when i wasted money on something he saw as silly. he doesn't remember when someone wronged him, or made a cruel joke at his expense. he forgets when the kids act out and misbehave. every second of his life is lived with this renewal, or better yet, a fresh start. there are no bad things in his world. nothing bad that can't be forgotten and started fresh and clean. how i admire and love that about him. it has been such an anchor for me to watch and admire thru these many years. he lives life with no grudges and what a wonderful life he lives.
he has given me a large amount of optimism the past few months, never loosing sight of important things. there have been many tears of frustration, exhaustion, and anxiety on my part, and he has been ever stalwart with kind hopeful words. how i love him. i love our life. and when a man as good as that eyes a jeep for a very long time, why, you say happy anniversary dear! and you watch with a thrill as he bounces around in his new (to him) jeep, dreaming of many summer nights with the top off and hair flying around. i told him to throw practicality out the door, and for once, do something wonderful for himself. while it took an awful lot of convincing, tonight, we are heading to a japanese fusion restaurant, riding in that jeep of his. oh, how good it is to be married to a man who forgets...
Sunday, June 17, 2012
summation - if that's a word
i've turned into a monthly post kind of a gal which made me think that these posts should be called a summation. then i thought that probably isn't a word so i took to wikipedia. it is real, only it's a term used for math - a long version of sum. so these posts are a life summation. how bout that?
this past month it seems life has pointed out exactly how old my children are getting which in turn makes me feel old. the only year 3 of my kids will be in elementary together is coming up soon. how did i grow to have THREE kids in school? i tell ella repeatedly that she cannot go to kindergarten. she is my baby and cannot grow up. i am feeling so lonely already. she has grown leaps and bounds these past few months. she is tough and kind and i love her until my heart aches. she has taken up to hanging out with some grand kids of our neighbor who runs a "farm". his property borders ours and there are cherry trees to climb and eat from, strawberries to eat as you collect, and horses to feed with baby kittens to look after as well. the ring around the tub at night is something for the record books. no longer are we in a dress phase only but now there are not enough jeans for her closet. jeans, jeans, jeans, everyday jeans. don't be fooled because ella the woman is still in full force. nails painted, jewelery adorned, and fancy things still are demanded daily. that temper is calming down and a wonderful, independent girl is coming out and it is a beautiful thing to see.
scott and i realized that it has been years since easton has played with toys. he will put together a lego star wars toy every christmas to appease us, but he is 8 going on 25. really. he went to goblin valley with scott and the teachers in the ward for a few days and scott said that they boys played try to stump east(PN). they couldn't. i don't think there is one more sports fact for him to memorize. we used to have a no sports talk on sunday to give me one days rest from something i have no clue about, but tonight i suggested a no talking rule period. he has come up with non sport facts about sports players that he tries to squeeze in often. like, mom, labron james loves to read, maybe we should send him a book of mormon. we are mourning our toy playing little boy and trying to embrace this mature adult trapped in a little boys body. he is kind and aware of so many things that seem beyond a boy going into 3rd grade. he is my sweet boy.
grayce is going to be a sixth grader. this hurts my heart. i feel like i am in the front of a ride at disneyland that is scary and i want to turn around. i am putting on a brave face and trying to think of all of those wonderful things that come with growing up but there are some tears held back often. i have loved having daughters around. because scott and i had no experience with sisters it has been trial and error but it has been a good adventure too. i have absolutely loved seeing grayce develop her beautiful voice the past two years. she has been able to sing in so many venues (solos) and it has been so amazing to watch her perform such a variety of different classic music. i never tire of that voice and the calmness she musters in such large groups to do what she loves. she finally got her own room as we chopped the toy room in half and put up a wall to make a smaller playroom and a bedroom for her. we now have 4 bedrooms and it feels like we have really arrived in life, really! (so silly)
little rowan. well, he's not so little anymore. just today he had to be taken from sabbath worship because he wouldn't stop biting and head butting me. he has a streak of boy that easton had at this age. i remember many times easton scratching someones face into bloody oblivion with the most innocent look on his face, over and over. i remember having to glove his hands and tie them to his waist once to get thru a double stroller ride. he turned out okay so i keep telling myself better trouble now then later, right? he never tires of the reaction he gets when he launches his meal across the room or throws a large object at someones head. mostly poor ella, but oh how he adores her. lellalella is his favorite word and he follows her around with hopeless adoration all day long. he is such a snuggle bug - i love little boys. there is something so magical about them. really, i can't describe why it is different to love a little boy, but it is so sweet and so calming to me. i am preparing for life with a two year old which means there might be ease with some things, but the mental battle is just being waged.
that redhead is eyebrow deep in church summer commitments and i often hoorah that we are at the four year mark being in the bishopric. summers take on new meaning when you are to attend girls camp, teachers camp, youth conference and so on. we are sneaking some summer adventures in there somehow but i am ready for a husband soon! he has fallen in love with neurosurgery and his job seems like a dream most days. he is best friends with his surgeon and loves waking up everyday.
i am on the mend. it has been a very slow process filled with lots of blood work and even more hard days. there is still no firm diagnosis other then some hormonal imbalances but it is getting better, little at a time. i have taken the desperate route after being told that there is nothing significantly wrong with me after loads of blood work. i am seeing two different chiropractors, taking two different approaches to getting better. i have hope. there is this part deep inside that feels hopeful that life is soon going to return to a manageable way. i have such empathy for people who battle chronic illness realizing that mine is hopefully temporary. life can be so hard! i'm beyond glad for sweet faces to make days easier!
this past month it seems life has pointed out exactly how old my children are getting which in turn makes me feel old. the only year 3 of my kids will be in elementary together is coming up soon. how did i grow to have THREE kids in school? i tell ella repeatedly that she cannot go to kindergarten. she is my baby and cannot grow up. i am feeling so lonely already. she has grown leaps and bounds these past few months. she is tough and kind and i love her until my heart aches. she has taken up to hanging out with some grand kids of our neighbor who runs a "farm". his property borders ours and there are cherry trees to climb and eat from, strawberries to eat as you collect, and horses to feed with baby kittens to look after as well. the ring around the tub at night is something for the record books. no longer are we in a dress phase only but now there are not enough jeans for her closet. jeans, jeans, jeans, everyday jeans. don't be fooled because ella the woman is still in full force. nails painted, jewelery adorned, and fancy things still are demanded daily. that temper is calming down and a wonderful, independent girl is coming out and it is a beautiful thing to see.
scott and i realized that it has been years since easton has played with toys. he will put together a lego star wars toy every christmas to appease us, but he is 8 going on 25. really. he went to goblin valley with scott and the teachers in the ward for a few days and scott said that they boys played try to stump east(PN). they couldn't. i don't think there is one more sports fact for him to memorize. we used to have a no sports talk on sunday to give me one days rest from something i have no clue about, but tonight i suggested a no talking rule period. he has come up with non sport facts about sports players that he tries to squeeze in often. like, mom, labron james loves to read, maybe we should send him a book of mormon. we are mourning our toy playing little boy and trying to embrace this mature adult trapped in a little boys body. he is kind and aware of so many things that seem beyond a boy going into 3rd grade. he is my sweet boy.
grayce is going to be a sixth grader. this hurts my heart. i feel like i am in the front of a ride at disneyland that is scary and i want to turn around. i am putting on a brave face and trying to think of all of those wonderful things that come with growing up but there are some tears held back often. i have loved having daughters around. because scott and i had no experience with sisters it has been trial and error but it has been a good adventure too. i have absolutely loved seeing grayce develop her beautiful voice the past two years. she has been able to sing in so many venues (solos) and it has been so amazing to watch her perform such a variety of different classic music. i never tire of that voice and the calmness she musters in such large groups to do what she loves. she finally got her own room as we chopped the toy room in half and put up a wall to make a smaller playroom and a bedroom for her. we now have 4 bedrooms and it feels like we have really arrived in life, really! (so silly)
little rowan. well, he's not so little anymore. just today he had to be taken from sabbath worship because he wouldn't stop biting and head butting me. he has a streak of boy that easton had at this age. i remember many times easton scratching someones face into bloody oblivion with the most innocent look on his face, over and over. i remember having to glove his hands and tie them to his waist once to get thru a double stroller ride. he turned out okay so i keep telling myself better trouble now then later, right? he never tires of the reaction he gets when he launches his meal across the room or throws a large object at someones head. mostly poor ella, but oh how he adores her. lellalella is his favorite word and he follows her around with hopeless adoration all day long. he is such a snuggle bug - i love little boys. there is something so magical about them. really, i can't describe why it is different to love a little boy, but it is so sweet and so calming to me. i am preparing for life with a two year old which means there might be ease with some things, but the mental battle is just being waged.
that redhead is eyebrow deep in church summer commitments and i often hoorah that we are at the four year mark being in the bishopric. summers take on new meaning when you are to attend girls camp, teachers camp, youth conference and so on. we are sneaking some summer adventures in there somehow but i am ready for a husband soon! he has fallen in love with neurosurgery and his job seems like a dream most days. he is best friends with his surgeon and loves waking up everyday.
i am on the mend. it has been a very slow process filled with lots of blood work and even more hard days. there is still no firm diagnosis other then some hormonal imbalances but it is getting better, little at a time. i have taken the desperate route after being told that there is nothing significantly wrong with me after loads of blood work. i am seeing two different chiropractors, taking two different approaches to getting better. i have hope. there is this part deep inside that feels hopeful that life is soon going to return to a manageable way. i have such empathy for people who battle chronic illness realizing that mine is hopefully temporary. life can be so hard! i'm beyond glad for sweet faces to make days easier!
Monday, May 21, 2012
i need two more legs and 3 more pair of hands.
while having babies and raising kids can sometimes be overlooked as routine and ordinary, i submit that everyday feels anything but the aforementioned.
there are days i long for being the mother of 2. i had it all under control, i knew exactly where the train was taking me, i felt so satisfied, so fulfilled. i loved living away from the mother ship hubble of mormon judgement and experiencing life as a little independent family on our own. it was so good, so right and dang it, so much easier that yesterday was. while we were definitely under stress concerning money (lack of), school, and time constraints, i felt like we were somehow mentally more free from the stress life has on our heaping buffet plates right now. yesterday was the sabbath and anymore it is a day we simply get thru. scott's meetings start before kids are up and my meetings fall somewhere in the middle. then 4 kids must look presentable and well cared for before church begins. there is no time for tantrums, disagreements, or general sleepiness the teasing summer nights bring that call us out of our bed longer than normal. i grit my teeth and get thru sharing time hoping rowan has stopped screaming in nursery and that no one has accidentally fed him anything containing peanuts, eggs, wheat, food colorings, cheese, pistachios, and on and on. i worry that easton is giving me smart alec remarks when i am asking questions about sacred things. grayce is abnormally tired sitting with her class and it seems puberty has taken my sweet girl and put her in the middle of a raging hormone battle. she cries more now than she did as an infant. ella is thriving in primary (finally!!) but it seems there are not enough hours to plan for all of the things that can cause upheaval on a sunday. there are so many needs and yet i can hardly make it thru an "ordinary day" without feeling overwhelmed. three weeks ago i went home midway thru sabbath worship feeling unwell. i was quite sure i was getting a migraine but hadn't had one for so long i couldn't remember. i went home to a dark house, ate a little something and took a nap. when i woke up it felt as though i woke up in a new body. my hands and feet were in pain i had never felt before. my head had this general pounding to it that wouldn't let up. my brain was so foggy. at church i thought it was odd i could not remember names of folks i had known for 12+ years. and not the "where is that in my brain" it was the i don't even know where to pull it from. to make a long and frustrating week short, i ended up going in to be tested for multiple auto immune disorders and other things. it seemed like a classic flare up of some auto immune disorder. suddenly carrying rowan up the stairs became impossible as did walking and using my hands. i noticed that after rowan was born i had joints in my fingers start to swell. it happened to 4 joints in an 18 month time period. after i had ella, i had some miserable arthritis in my back but it was determined it was from the pregnancy that taxed my frame so severely. i really didn't think too much of the joints although i knew it was abnormal.
waiting for the test results was the longest weekend of my life. i wondered what the test results would be and what my new life might be like. i knew that i was experiencing some hormonal issues as my body had such a hard time after i stopped nursing rowan. things were feeling off.
when the doctor called me we were relieved to hear that nothing showing any sign of auto immune problems came back positive, nor did any sign of inflammation with joints or signs of arthritis. my hormone levels were off but because i experience aura migraines, my risk for heart attack, stroke and so on is elevated bringing those levels up with pills. he told me that most likely i was suffering from premenstrual syndrome, severely, and that i was probably experiencing fluctuating calcium levels. i went in and had a nexplanon put in under my arm and have been chomping tums like they are going out of style. the nexplanon is a form of birth control (the only one i can have) that is a small rod that they shoot in your skin under your arm. it basically stops female function for three years. this was done so that my body can stabilize the hormones on its own.
but....
it feels really wimpy when i tell scott that i couldn't even dress and bath the kids because my hands were hurting so bad, you know dear, it's the PMS. (and apparently the severe PMS mimics auto immune disorders) he will come home to mass chaos, all with a smile, while i blame it on what feels to be a made up thing. then i skipped calcium for 2 days because i was able to almost function the whole day! i was subsequently in bed for the next two days trying to get my calcium levels up.
my house has gone to the dogs while i am waiting for things to stabilize. all of those ordinary things that used to seem so routine seem so overwhelming now. and i want to cry - a lot. i only cry at the pulpit, never ever over anything else but death. ever. i am just not programmed to get emotional like that, i go into survival mode not panic mode. i want to cry because the local wingers went out of business and one night i needed 2 wings from the joint. i want to cry because i had a girls night out and just couldn't seem to recover from getting in bed past 10:00. i want to cry because i miss my husband and sometimes wish he would take up alcohol to get out of half of his time commitments. but then the line comes into my head that this life is the time for man to prepare to meet god. somehow, i think when i meet god, it wouldn't mean as much if i didn't know him. it just might not mean as much if my thoughts weren't directed to him thru the happy parts of my day in gratitude and the low points of ordinary chaos. whether we choose to acknowledge it or not, we will one day meet god and that is the thought that seems to make my heavy heart a little bit lighter thru the bits of trial that will soon lift. in the mean time, that time of communion with god might often be heard from my lips to be asking for two more legs to go 4 different directions with my kids and 3 more pair of hands to hold their faces all at once.
there are days i long for being the mother of 2. i had it all under control, i knew exactly where the train was taking me, i felt so satisfied, so fulfilled. i loved living away from the mother ship hubble of mormon judgement and experiencing life as a little independent family on our own. it was so good, so right and dang it, so much easier that yesterday was. while we were definitely under stress concerning money (lack of), school, and time constraints, i felt like we were somehow mentally more free from the stress life has on our heaping buffet plates right now. yesterday was the sabbath and anymore it is a day we simply get thru. scott's meetings start before kids are up and my meetings fall somewhere in the middle. then 4 kids must look presentable and well cared for before church begins. there is no time for tantrums, disagreements, or general sleepiness the teasing summer nights bring that call us out of our bed longer than normal. i grit my teeth and get thru sharing time hoping rowan has stopped screaming in nursery and that no one has accidentally fed him anything containing peanuts, eggs, wheat, food colorings, cheese, pistachios, and on and on. i worry that easton is giving me smart alec remarks when i am asking questions about sacred things. grayce is abnormally tired sitting with her class and it seems puberty has taken my sweet girl and put her in the middle of a raging hormone battle. she cries more now than she did as an infant. ella is thriving in primary (finally!!) but it seems there are not enough hours to plan for all of the things that can cause upheaval on a sunday. there are so many needs and yet i can hardly make it thru an "ordinary day" without feeling overwhelmed. three weeks ago i went home midway thru sabbath worship feeling unwell. i was quite sure i was getting a migraine but hadn't had one for so long i couldn't remember. i went home to a dark house, ate a little something and took a nap. when i woke up it felt as though i woke up in a new body. my hands and feet were in pain i had never felt before. my head had this general pounding to it that wouldn't let up. my brain was so foggy. at church i thought it was odd i could not remember names of folks i had known for 12+ years. and not the "where is that in my brain" it was the i don't even know where to pull it from. to make a long and frustrating week short, i ended up going in to be tested for multiple auto immune disorders and other things. it seemed like a classic flare up of some auto immune disorder. suddenly carrying rowan up the stairs became impossible as did walking and using my hands. i noticed that after rowan was born i had joints in my fingers start to swell. it happened to 4 joints in an 18 month time period. after i had ella, i had some miserable arthritis in my back but it was determined it was from the pregnancy that taxed my frame so severely. i really didn't think too much of the joints although i knew it was abnormal.
waiting for the test results was the longest weekend of my life. i wondered what the test results would be and what my new life might be like. i knew that i was experiencing some hormonal issues as my body had such a hard time after i stopped nursing rowan. things were feeling off.
when the doctor called me we were relieved to hear that nothing showing any sign of auto immune problems came back positive, nor did any sign of inflammation with joints or signs of arthritis. my hormone levels were off but because i experience aura migraines, my risk for heart attack, stroke and so on is elevated bringing those levels up with pills. he told me that most likely i was suffering from premenstrual syndrome, severely, and that i was probably experiencing fluctuating calcium levels. i went in and had a nexplanon put in under my arm and have been chomping tums like they are going out of style. the nexplanon is a form of birth control (the only one i can have) that is a small rod that they shoot in your skin under your arm. it basically stops female function for three years. this was done so that my body can stabilize the hormones on its own.
but....
it feels really wimpy when i tell scott that i couldn't even dress and bath the kids because my hands were hurting so bad, you know dear, it's the PMS. (and apparently the severe PMS mimics auto immune disorders) he will come home to mass chaos, all with a smile, while i blame it on what feels to be a made up thing. then i skipped calcium for 2 days because i was able to almost function the whole day! i was subsequently in bed for the next two days trying to get my calcium levels up.
my house has gone to the dogs while i am waiting for things to stabilize. all of those ordinary things that used to seem so routine seem so overwhelming now. and i want to cry - a lot. i only cry at the pulpit, never ever over anything else but death. ever. i am just not programmed to get emotional like that, i go into survival mode not panic mode. i want to cry because the local wingers went out of business and one night i needed 2 wings from the joint. i want to cry because i had a girls night out and just couldn't seem to recover from getting in bed past 10:00. i want to cry because i miss my husband and sometimes wish he would take up alcohol to get out of half of his time commitments. but then the line comes into my head that this life is the time for man to prepare to meet god. somehow, i think when i meet god, it wouldn't mean as much if i didn't know him. it just might not mean as much if my thoughts weren't directed to him thru the happy parts of my day in gratitude and the low points of ordinary chaos. whether we choose to acknowledge it or not, we will one day meet god and that is the thought that seems to make my heavy heart a little bit lighter thru the bits of trial that will soon lift. in the mean time, that time of communion with god might often be heard from my lips to be asking for two more legs to go 4 different directions with my kids and 3 more pair of hands to hold their faces all at once.
Thursday, April 12, 2012
spring break, literally.
spring break is always exciting and intoxicating to me. i get to have my kids home for a week and we get every hope up for the summer to come. we feel the laziness of the days and the flowing summer routine starts to shape up. playing until dark, dinner eaten outside, a fun activity here and there and no strict schedule.
it was wonderful but a bit exciting as well. we went on our first venture to the kangaroo zoo. i am not a normal mother. you know this by now. i would be more likely to take my kids to a park all day and let them explore versus taking them to a structured play area. there are so many things i fear at public play places. mostly poop. i have seen what can happen at home from rowdy play and i just can't be responsible for other mothers diapering. it makes me so nervous. i worry about the germs and what not. so, it was with no real shock that ella turned up with a rotten case of the true blue croup. my kids have had coughs that come and go that resemble the croup, but the full blown screaming for air and sounding like a vacuum cleaner for days. right as that happened, easton was holding his hand funny one night and that prompted us to get x-rays within 24 hours. last month grayce complained her foot hurt and after a while we took her in. turns out the bone was chipped on her foot and thank goodness she didn't need surgery. so, over spring break we had croup, a broken hand, a walking boot and sunday night were awoken to a burning fevered ella. she was sent to the hospital for x-rays as she had pneumonia last month and they wanted to make sure she was unlucky in contracting a second virus and not a complication from the wicked croup. throw in some allergies and it was a spring break i am hoping is not indicative of our summer. the doctor was truthful in telling me we should watch ella closely because she has had a very rough year. we need to watch the fevers. of course i turned into a ball of nerves because no one else got croup but it turns out rowan woke up with the fever this morning. i have never ever been so glad to have someone else get the germs! really. he woke up with a scream at 5:45 am and i rejoiced to scott that he had the fever!!!! ella is on her way to recovery and the fever only lasted 24 hours. but it will be a spring break we won't soon forget.
it was wonderful but a bit exciting as well. we went on our first venture to the kangaroo zoo. i am not a normal mother. you know this by now. i would be more likely to take my kids to a park all day and let them explore versus taking them to a structured play area. there are so many things i fear at public play places. mostly poop. i have seen what can happen at home from rowdy play and i just can't be responsible for other mothers diapering. it makes me so nervous. i worry about the germs and what not. so, it was with no real shock that ella turned up with a rotten case of the true blue croup. my kids have had coughs that come and go that resemble the croup, but the full blown screaming for air and sounding like a vacuum cleaner for days. right as that happened, easton was holding his hand funny one night and that prompted us to get x-rays within 24 hours. last month grayce complained her foot hurt and after a while we took her in. turns out the bone was chipped on her foot and thank goodness she didn't need surgery. so, over spring break we had croup, a broken hand, a walking boot and sunday night were awoken to a burning fevered ella. she was sent to the hospital for x-rays as she had pneumonia last month and they wanted to make sure she was unlucky in contracting a second virus and not a complication from the wicked croup. throw in some allergies and it was a spring break i am hoping is not indicative of our summer. the doctor was truthful in telling me we should watch ella closely because she has had a very rough year. we need to watch the fevers. of course i turned into a ball of nerves because no one else got croup but it turns out rowan woke up with the fever this morning. i have never ever been so glad to have someone else get the germs! really. he woke up with a scream at 5:45 am and i rejoiced to scott that he had the fever!!!! ella is on her way to recovery and the fever only lasted 24 hours. but it will be a spring break we won't soon forget.
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
it's vulgar, i know. my mother is disappointed in me
but my kids hands smell like butt.
this was disturbing to me on many levels. the smell on their hands, grayce and easton specifically, was reason for me to call a major news corporation to investigate. this could be why they have been the bearers of the vomits so many times this year. i was pouring over the reasons i should feel guilty over their smelly hands and then decided that i would take the approach of the french parents i have been hearing all about. i identify with the french and their methods. my kids are generally well behaved in public. i don't find myself tearing my hair out at home with their behavior, but i have found a look has developed with the birth of my third. it could be that the third one tilts the dynamic of the entire balance of one adult for every child. i have found that generally, two children are the honeymooning phase of parenting. being outnumbered can cause a plethora of problems. mainly, there are not enough hours in the day to gently or patiently discipline. the third one at our house gets parented with the look. i always try to tell myself when a disciplinary situation presents itself that anger is not an option. getting mad at my kids does nothing but deplete my emotional and mental reserves. so, the look has been born. i can get away with the look or raising my hand to count and my kids shape up, usually.
this has come in handy especially as the butt smell has come to light. i can flare my nostrils real large and unnatural looking and the kids head to the bathroom. i hope that by the first sentence of this post you won't think poorly of me. just today grayce tried telling easton that his uncasted arm smelled like butt. she was given the look. do as i say not as i uh,er do-say. my kids can't say butt because i was not allowed to say butt. even when i was telling my mother about the smell i felt guilty telling her it smelled like butt. i fear telling her that the smell of bum bum wouldn't get the same response.
the good news came to me as i was sitting with my 5th grade daughter at her maturation program. that's right. the county stepped in to tell my daughter about her changing body. two summers ago i gave my daughter the american girl body book to read. we read and skimmed together but she mostly took the lead on educating herself with her nose in the book and a large pillow in front to block any nosy siblings from her education. i didn't stop to think about an eight year old reading unfamiliar terms and what kind of pronunciation she would come up with. i discovered my error at the program. i will let you use your imagination but she leaned over to me twice to clarify the names of certain things. one thing she needed clarification on was what she thought was a state named after a female part. she wondered why they would name the female anatomy after the state of virginia. also, she thought the term public hair was what it was called because everyone has it. i thought i would be kicked out by the teachers i was laughing so hard. but, the real reason for this side note is because the school nurse explained to us in great detail that at the age when change starts, it causes the glands all over the body to produce a white thick film that has major odor. i was aware of under arms being a problem, but apparently it can cause a horrific smell anywhere the glands are located. my kids have actually had chaffed hands because of the look i give that ques the washing. it was of great relief to me to know that they were not dipping their hands in a bucket of butt, in fact, their glands were to blame.
and don't worry, scotty is hard at work developing hand odor eliminator that will make us our millions. just think of it, apply hand odor eliminator and then cover with handerpants...........
this was disturbing to me on many levels. the smell on their hands, grayce and easton specifically, was reason for me to call a major news corporation to investigate. this could be why they have been the bearers of the vomits so many times this year. i was pouring over the reasons i should feel guilty over their smelly hands and then decided that i would take the approach of the french parents i have been hearing all about. i identify with the french and their methods. my kids are generally well behaved in public. i don't find myself tearing my hair out at home with their behavior, but i have found a look has developed with the birth of my third. it could be that the third one tilts the dynamic of the entire balance of one adult for every child. i have found that generally, two children are the honeymooning phase of parenting. being outnumbered can cause a plethora of problems. mainly, there are not enough hours in the day to gently or patiently discipline. the third one at our house gets parented with the look. i always try to tell myself when a disciplinary situation presents itself that anger is not an option. getting mad at my kids does nothing but deplete my emotional and mental reserves. so, the look has been born. i can get away with the look or raising my hand to count and my kids shape up, usually.
this has come in handy especially as the butt smell has come to light. i can flare my nostrils real large and unnatural looking and the kids head to the bathroom. i hope that by the first sentence of this post you won't think poorly of me. just today grayce tried telling easton that his uncasted arm smelled like butt. she was given the look. do as i say not as i uh,er do-say. my kids can't say butt because i was not allowed to say butt. even when i was telling my mother about the smell i felt guilty telling her it smelled like butt. i fear telling her that the smell of bum bum wouldn't get the same response.
the good news came to me as i was sitting with my 5th grade daughter at her maturation program. that's right. the county stepped in to tell my daughter about her changing body. two summers ago i gave my daughter the american girl body book to read. we read and skimmed together but she mostly took the lead on educating herself with her nose in the book and a large pillow in front to block any nosy siblings from her education. i didn't stop to think about an eight year old reading unfamiliar terms and what kind of pronunciation she would come up with. i discovered my error at the program. i will let you use your imagination but she leaned over to me twice to clarify the names of certain things. one thing she needed clarification on was what she thought was a state named after a female part. she wondered why they would name the female anatomy after the state of virginia. also, she thought the term public hair was what it was called because everyone has it. i thought i would be kicked out by the teachers i was laughing so hard. but, the real reason for this side note is because the school nurse explained to us in great detail that at the age when change starts, it causes the glands all over the body to produce a white thick film that has major odor. i was aware of under arms being a problem, but apparently it can cause a horrific smell anywhere the glands are located. my kids have actually had chaffed hands because of the look i give that ques the washing. it was of great relief to me to know that they were not dipping their hands in a bucket of butt, in fact, their glands were to blame.
and don't worry, scotty is hard at work developing hand odor eliminator that will make us our millions. just think of it, apply hand odor eliminator and then cover with handerpants...........
i am not pregnant
the last post has left me with quizzical glances from family and friends alike. for that reason i would like to say that although i did take a pregnancy test, it was negative. there was no intent or expectation that it would be positive but i had reason to be suspicious. and i also must mention that i would not be needing prozac if i was pregnant. me, of all people, the girl who was told that i would be lucky to be pregnant once in my lifetime, would rejoice at such a surprise!
on another unrelated note, i have been having the most wonderful sabbath days lately. i, for no logical reason, was called to serve in our primary presidency. i was told by a couple of people that logic did not put me there but a really strong feeling that i needed to be in there. i had the chance to serve as the primary president in new haven and had the most choice experience while doing it. but, i do have to say, it was VASTLY different there. here, we have function. people follow the rules and have real live meetings. there are forms to be filled out, programs to be run off, serious stuff. we have a secretary that makes endless lists of classes and changes and scout lists. oh mercy, scouts. it happens that i have been put over scouts and it is a confirmation to me that i lack humility. right now i would say that i love what scouting does for my sweet little 8 year old. in the same breath i would say that i do not love that the scout program in general feels it necessary to hold a meeting if someone needs to sneeze. it is time consuming madness. i feel like my eyes each have holes poked in the sides of them and i just can't see properly. i don't quite get it.
but, my favorite part of primary is sharing time. oh, i love spending 15 minutes every week with the kids to tell them about the gospel. i am not a flowery person, i don't do games, i don't laminate or coloring. but, how i love to tell. i love to gather those kids around (my own included) and tell them about those wonderful things that pricked my heart at their age. i love that sacred primary room and i tear up thinking about all of the wonderful things that happen in that room. all the tender feelings felt by kids week after week that add that line upon line to their testimonies. a couple of months ago the topic was to teach the kids about our prophet. i prayed all week that i would know what to share with them. i read and skimmed over a few things and after all of that i had the impression that they might enjoy hearing some stories from president monson's book about his life. i loved reading it myself and thought heidi swinton did a remarkable job. i gathered a few stories about his childhood that i thought would be appealing to all of the kids.
i was reading one story in particular about president monson making the primary president cry because he was being so rowdy with his friends. it then talks about how years later he visits her in the hospital and finds her memory gone and mind fading. he is reassured by the other people around her that she wouldn't know who he was. he continued to feed her and gently speak about her kindness to him. with the visit coming to an end, she looked up at him and said, "i know you, you are tommy monson my primary boy. oh how i love you." i of course was teary and let those sweet faces know how much i loved them. one boy, our "lively" spirit of the bunch, really identified with the story and piped up saying "you mean a kid like me could end up being a prophet?". i looked him square in the eye and emphatically replied "YES!". i have thought about that experience many times. maybe sharing that story was just for ethan, but maybe it was more for me. his statement bore testimony to me that it was an ordinary boy that the lord preserved and raised up to be a man of god. tommy monson was a regular boy, filled with ordinary acts and extraordinary choices. he is a prophet of god preserved to do his work.
that is why i love primary. i am quite sure that these opportunities could be given a million of excuses as to why they couldn't perform these callings. i have come to find out that although the task may seem inconvenient, the rewards are for us. my testimony has grown vastly as i meet with these kids every week. it is hard to make it on time with 4 little kids to get ready and a husband at meetings all day long, but i would never ever trade the opportunity. it is such a blessing to see what the lord will let us become when we have faith and follow!
on another unrelated note, i have been having the most wonderful sabbath days lately. i, for no logical reason, was called to serve in our primary presidency. i was told by a couple of people that logic did not put me there but a really strong feeling that i needed to be in there. i had the chance to serve as the primary president in new haven and had the most choice experience while doing it. but, i do have to say, it was VASTLY different there. here, we have function. people follow the rules and have real live meetings. there are forms to be filled out, programs to be run off, serious stuff. we have a secretary that makes endless lists of classes and changes and scout lists. oh mercy, scouts. it happens that i have been put over scouts and it is a confirmation to me that i lack humility. right now i would say that i love what scouting does for my sweet little 8 year old. in the same breath i would say that i do not love that the scout program in general feels it necessary to hold a meeting if someone needs to sneeze. it is time consuming madness. i feel like my eyes each have holes poked in the sides of them and i just can't see properly. i don't quite get it.
but, my favorite part of primary is sharing time. oh, i love spending 15 minutes every week with the kids to tell them about the gospel. i am not a flowery person, i don't do games, i don't laminate or coloring. but, how i love to tell. i love to gather those kids around (my own included) and tell them about those wonderful things that pricked my heart at their age. i love that sacred primary room and i tear up thinking about all of the wonderful things that happen in that room. all the tender feelings felt by kids week after week that add that line upon line to their testimonies. a couple of months ago the topic was to teach the kids about our prophet. i prayed all week that i would know what to share with them. i read and skimmed over a few things and after all of that i had the impression that they might enjoy hearing some stories from president monson's book about his life. i loved reading it myself and thought heidi swinton did a remarkable job. i gathered a few stories about his childhood that i thought would be appealing to all of the kids.
i was reading one story in particular about president monson making the primary president cry because he was being so rowdy with his friends. it then talks about how years later he visits her in the hospital and finds her memory gone and mind fading. he is reassured by the other people around her that she wouldn't know who he was. he continued to feed her and gently speak about her kindness to him. with the visit coming to an end, she looked up at him and said, "i know you, you are tommy monson my primary boy. oh how i love you." i of course was teary and let those sweet faces know how much i loved them. one boy, our "lively" spirit of the bunch, really identified with the story and piped up saying "you mean a kid like me could end up being a prophet?". i looked him square in the eye and emphatically replied "YES!". i have thought about that experience many times. maybe sharing that story was just for ethan, but maybe it was more for me. his statement bore testimony to me that it was an ordinary boy that the lord preserved and raised up to be a man of god. tommy monson was a regular boy, filled with ordinary acts and extraordinary choices. he is a prophet of god preserved to do his work.
that is why i love primary. i am quite sure that these opportunities could be given a million of excuses as to why they couldn't perform these callings. i have come to find out that although the task may seem inconvenient, the rewards are for us. my testimony has grown vastly as i meet with these kids every week. it is hard to make it on time with 4 little kids to get ready and a husband at meetings all day long, but i would never ever trade the opportunity. it is such a blessing to see what the lord will let us become when we have faith and follow!
Sunday, April 1, 2012
while i'm not world's best holiday mom....
...i put on a mean april fool's day this year. i hope heaven is full of laughing because there is nothing better to me that having a good laugh. it compares to a good meal in my book.
this year we invited some guests over for a "sundee dinner" (that was the title of my email invitation). little did they know that my kids and i had been working all weekend on an april fools dinner. first off, the kids greeted our guests in robes while some of the kids were in the background making puking noises. "didn't you get the message, we have the vomits".
for our first course at dinner, we had clear glasses with jello and fruit with a straw for effect when we told them it was fruit punch. we served cupcakes and double layered cake for dinner which was meatloaf with mashed potatoes for frosting. i put globs of blue dough in the rolls so it looked like moldy rolls, and for dessert, well we did what any experienced april fooler would do. we bought loads of sponges, some brown RIT clothing dye and a package of frosting. we dyed the sponges, dried them off and frosted them with the most delicious fudge frosting. they really look legit. the kids had planned out who would be served first for the brownies. after our guests realized there were no brownies, they were confused when we told them we had some baked potatoes for dessert (ice cream rolled in cinnamon and sugar with honey butter atop).
perhaps the funniest moment of the meal came when my mother announced that grandma helen was pregnant (she's embarking on her 94th bday this year)! my mother was quite pleased with her quick whit, as was grandma. we had a wonderful night of laughter.
all in all it was a great foolers holiday. we may or may not have gotten carried away when we thought of the best humored people in our neighborhood to take sponge brownies to. we had sweet ella use that magic voice, go up to the porch and say - "here bishop, we made this brownie just for you". or "here Lorrin, we made a new recipe and thought you would love it". i think my kids might have dribbled a bit they were laughing so hard. then when we got home they were thinking of all the things these people might do to get us back, including and not limited to, scott's name on our weekly church program being listed as Sister Scott McKay as punishment from the bishop. then, feeling guilt, they all resolved that we would make them our infamous s'mores brownies for family night tomorrow night as a peace offering.
i for one appreciate a funny little april fools joke.........but not the one where i had to take a pregnancy test today.
this year we invited some guests over for a "sundee dinner" (that was the title of my email invitation). little did they know that my kids and i had been working all weekend on an april fools dinner. first off, the kids greeted our guests in robes while some of the kids were in the background making puking noises. "didn't you get the message, we have the vomits".
for our first course at dinner, we had clear glasses with jello and fruit with a straw for effect when we told them it was fruit punch. we served cupcakes and double layered cake for dinner which was meatloaf with mashed potatoes for frosting. i put globs of blue dough in the rolls so it looked like moldy rolls, and for dessert, well we did what any experienced april fooler would do. we bought loads of sponges, some brown RIT clothing dye and a package of frosting. we dyed the sponges, dried them off and frosted them with the most delicious fudge frosting. they really look legit. the kids had planned out who would be served first for the brownies. after our guests realized there were no brownies, they were confused when we told them we had some baked potatoes for dessert (ice cream rolled in cinnamon and sugar with honey butter atop).
perhaps the funniest moment of the meal came when my mother announced that grandma helen was pregnant (she's embarking on her 94th bday this year)! my mother was quite pleased with her quick whit, as was grandma. we had a wonderful night of laughter.
all in all it was a great foolers holiday. we may or may not have gotten carried away when we thought of the best humored people in our neighborhood to take sponge brownies to. we had sweet ella use that magic voice, go up to the porch and say - "here bishop, we made this brownie just for you". or "here Lorrin, we made a new recipe and thought you would love it". i think my kids might have dribbled a bit they were laughing so hard. then when we got home they were thinking of all the things these people might do to get us back, including and not limited to, scott's name on our weekly church program being listed as Sister Scott McKay as punishment from the bishop. then, feeling guilt, they all resolved that we would make them our infamous s'mores brownies for family night tomorrow night as a peace offering.
i for one appreciate a funny little april fools joke.........but not the one where i had to take a pregnancy test today.
Friday, March 30, 2012
blogging is dead.
does anyone else feel that way? no, yes?
every time i write something on this blog lately, i am surely blasted away with exactly the opposite of what i was writing about. call it humble pie or maybe a good confirmation that the lord has a sense of humor.
case in point.
a recent post of mine included my ease into the world of vomiting. yes, i proclaimed loud and clear that i don't get quite so upset when vomit flies at my house. i am an experienced mother and it doesn't frazzle me as much as it used to. the next post was regarding the violence with which the stomach bug has hit us this year. all four kids went thru 6, count them, SIX rounds of vomiting bugs this winter.
example number 2.
i took it upon myself to make any mother who does not place priority on getting showered and ready every morning feel awesome when i wrote about how it is my rock. it still is. but my trade off is that i take a walk with the kids in the afternoons instead of going to the gym everyday. i don't need intense workouts or whatever else other mothers do. and, i don't shop. not unless i have to. and, i don't craft. but, i was feeling frustrated with my morning routine of getting ready after the kids left for school, so i switched that up and have it done before they wake up. it has made a HUGE difference. the entire pregnancy with little rowan and the past year and a half i have longed for the day when i could do that. i have been just hoping for that glorious morning when i wasn't exhausted from nights on end with pregnancy woes, or baby screaming all night.
also, i wrote recently about how if you EVER see me in my jammies at dinnertime, you need to call the relief society to bring me dinner because something must be terribly wrong. rowan somehow got hold of that post and instead of calling the relief society at dinner time, he called the police. the number 9 to be exact. this is an offense punishable by having an officer come to your house and lecture the child about not playing with the phone. i was not feeling up to par and decided i needed desperately to try and sneak some naps in during the day to get over whatever bug was ailing me. i had myself all talked into it because i had not taken one sick day during all of the misery this winter has brought. i cancelled appointments, served leftovers from sunday dinner all day and laid down as much as possible. it was totally awesome to have a man in uniform talk to me about the dangers of an infant dialing 9 on the phone. like, awesome. disaster house, kids in pajamas at 5:00pm, and a remodeling project strewn all about my house right there for the officer to see. and don't worry, i have already received multiple calls about receiving the mother of the year this year;)
so, blogging just might be dead around these parts for a while until i am sufficiently humbled into writing decent blog posts.
every time i write something on this blog lately, i am surely blasted away with exactly the opposite of what i was writing about. call it humble pie or maybe a good confirmation that the lord has a sense of humor.
case in point.
a recent post of mine included my ease into the world of vomiting. yes, i proclaimed loud and clear that i don't get quite so upset when vomit flies at my house. i am an experienced mother and it doesn't frazzle me as much as it used to. the next post was regarding the violence with which the stomach bug has hit us this year. all four kids went thru 6, count them, SIX rounds of vomiting bugs this winter.
example number 2.
i took it upon myself to make any mother who does not place priority on getting showered and ready every morning feel awesome when i wrote about how it is my rock. it still is. but my trade off is that i take a walk with the kids in the afternoons instead of going to the gym everyday. i don't need intense workouts or whatever else other mothers do. and, i don't shop. not unless i have to. and, i don't craft. but, i was feeling frustrated with my morning routine of getting ready after the kids left for school, so i switched that up and have it done before they wake up. it has made a HUGE difference. the entire pregnancy with little rowan and the past year and a half i have longed for the day when i could do that. i have been just hoping for that glorious morning when i wasn't exhausted from nights on end with pregnancy woes, or baby screaming all night.
also, i wrote recently about how if you EVER see me in my jammies at dinnertime, you need to call the relief society to bring me dinner because something must be terribly wrong. rowan somehow got hold of that post and instead of calling the relief society at dinner time, he called the police. the number 9 to be exact. this is an offense punishable by having an officer come to your house and lecture the child about not playing with the phone. i was not feeling up to par and decided i needed desperately to try and sneak some naps in during the day to get over whatever bug was ailing me. i had myself all talked into it because i had not taken one sick day during all of the misery this winter has brought. i cancelled appointments, served leftovers from sunday dinner all day and laid down as much as possible. it was totally awesome to have a man in uniform talk to me about the dangers of an infant dialing 9 on the phone. like, awesome. disaster house, kids in pajamas at 5:00pm, and a remodeling project strewn all about my house right there for the officer to see. and don't worry, i have already received multiple calls about receiving the mother of the year this year;)
so, blogging just might be dead around these parts for a while until i am sufficiently humbled into writing decent blog posts.
i try to steer away from trouble, BUT
i could not help myself. this really made me think.
An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that Obama's socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.
The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on Obama's plan". All grades will be averaged and everyone will receive the same grade so no one will fail and no one will receive an A.... (substituting grades for dollars - something closer to home and more readily understood by all).
After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.
The second test average was a D! No one was happy. When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F. As the tests proceeded, the scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.
To their great surprise, ALL FAILED and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great, but when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed. It could not be any simpler than that. Remember, there IS a test coming up. The 2012 elections.
These are possibly the 5 best sentences you'll ever read and all applicable to this experiment:
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it!
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.
An economics professor at a local college made a statement that he had never failed a single student before, but had recently failed an entire class. That class had insisted that Obama's socialism worked and that no one would be poor and no one would be rich, a great equalizer.
The professor then said, "OK, we will have an experiment in this class on Obama's plan". All grades will be averaged and everyone will receive the same grade so no one will fail and no one will receive an A.... (substituting grades for dollars - something closer to home and more readily understood by all).
After the first test, the grades were averaged and everyone got a B. The students who studied hard were upset and the students who studied little were happy. As the second test rolled around, the students who studied little had studied even less and the ones who studied hard decided they wanted a free ride too so they studied little.
The second test average was a D! No one was happy. When the 3rd test rolled around, the average was an F. As the tests proceeded, the scores never increased as bickering, blame and name-calling all resulted in hard feelings and no one would study for the benefit of anyone else.
To their great surprise, ALL FAILED and the professor told them that socialism would also ultimately fail because when the reward is great, the effort to succeed is great, but when government takes all the reward away, no one will try or want to succeed. It could not be any simpler than that. Remember, there IS a test coming up. The 2012 elections.
These are possibly the 5 best sentences you'll ever read and all applicable to this experiment:
1. You cannot legislate the poor into prosperity by legislating the wealthy out of prosperity.
2. What one person receives without working for, another person must work for without receiving.
3. The government cannot give to anybody anything that the government does not first take from somebody else.
4. You cannot multiply wealth by dividing it!
5. When half of the people get the idea that they do not have to work because the other half is going to take care of them, and when the other half gets the idea that it does no good to work because somebody else is going to get what they work for, that is the beginning of the end of any nation.
Wednesday, March 14, 2012
investment
last month the topic of discussion for the power of mom's learning circle was pertaining to that cute, fun, girl that sometimes gets stifled by the busyness of motherhood.
it was a really interesting discussion. the topic brought out opinions that were so varied from the different stages we were all in with our present mothering situation. the bottom line was that at some point in the journey of motherhood, usually when change comes, something often times is sacrificed. whether it be a routine for getting ready for the day, cleaning, a social life, or the continual desire to educate our minds.
every person sacrifices something for motherhood. there has to be something given up when heaven's windows are opened. it was interesting to me that it is usually something that requires a mother ample opportunity to be humbled.
i have had many situations as a mother that have humbled me right into next year. one thing that has been my anchor for not loosing myself in the insanity motherhood offers is giving myself, husband, and kids a showered, made up self EVERY.DAY.POSSIBLE.
if you come to my house and see me in my pajamas unshowered after 12pm, please call the relief society to bring me dinner. DONT call the relief society if my house is cluttered or my kids don't have the latest fashion trends. DO call the relief society if my kids have eaten processed food for a week straight.
there are things i have to have to function as a mother everyday that differ vastly from another. i do feel blessed that my mother put her best foot forward everyday by never being caught in pajamas at dinner time. she got up everyday and gave herself the gift of putting herself together. that one principle has kept me in tact as a mother. my first task with babies is to figure out how to shower in the morning while they are safely kept. with my first one it meant bringing in the car seat to the bathroom while i could still see baby and had that shower every morning and took the time to get ready. with my fourth it meant putting together a little bathroom basket with things he can pull out and play with while i am showering and can still see him. they become part of the routine and can see it is important to me. all my kids have learned to respect it and follow suite themselves, giving themselves the opportunity to spend some time gaining momentum and confidence for the day by honoring this ritual. there is no sink of dishes too big, or errand so important that it will win over giving myself that time to get made up and get it together. i can enter the rest of my day with confidence and pride in the time i invested in me.
i have had to make some compromises on days when the tasks begin early. in the past two years i have come to be okay with washing my long hair every other day. it drove me to insanity the first few months i did it, but it has slowly become routine and one of the selling points for long hair. also, sometimes, a super early morning might warrant a bath the night before so i have have 30 more minutes to devote to getting 4 kids out the door. as we discussed the article i realized that i have never ever suffered the blahs of motherhood due to the fact that i feel lost as a person. it made me feel glad that the anchor i held onto as a person has been what has kept me together as a mother. it made me feel less guilty for the things i am not great at (such as having a spotless house all the time, or volunteering at every one of my kids endeavors to name a few)..
i love those moments when we discover strength in the thick of thin things! it was such a good feeling!!
it was a really interesting discussion. the topic brought out opinions that were so varied from the different stages we were all in with our present mothering situation. the bottom line was that at some point in the journey of motherhood, usually when change comes, something often times is sacrificed. whether it be a routine for getting ready for the day, cleaning, a social life, or the continual desire to educate our minds.
every person sacrifices something for motherhood. there has to be something given up when heaven's windows are opened. it was interesting to me that it is usually something that requires a mother ample opportunity to be humbled.
i have had many situations as a mother that have humbled me right into next year. one thing that has been my anchor for not loosing myself in the insanity motherhood offers is giving myself, husband, and kids a showered, made up self EVERY.DAY.POSSIBLE.
if you come to my house and see me in my pajamas unshowered after 12pm, please call the relief society to bring me dinner. DONT call the relief society if my house is cluttered or my kids don't have the latest fashion trends. DO call the relief society if my kids have eaten processed food for a week straight.
there are things i have to have to function as a mother everyday that differ vastly from another. i do feel blessed that my mother put her best foot forward everyday by never being caught in pajamas at dinner time. she got up everyday and gave herself the gift of putting herself together. that one principle has kept me in tact as a mother. my first task with babies is to figure out how to shower in the morning while they are safely kept. with my first one it meant bringing in the car seat to the bathroom while i could still see baby and had that shower every morning and took the time to get ready. with my fourth it meant putting together a little bathroom basket with things he can pull out and play with while i am showering and can still see him. they become part of the routine and can see it is important to me. all my kids have learned to respect it and follow suite themselves, giving themselves the opportunity to spend some time gaining momentum and confidence for the day by honoring this ritual. there is no sink of dishes too big, or errand so important that it will win over giving myself that time to get made up and get it together. i can enter the rest of my day with confidence and pride in the time i invested in me.
i have had to make some compromises on days when the tasks begin early. in the past two years i have come to be okay with washing my long hair every other day. it drove me to insanity the first few months i did it, but it has slowly become routine and one of the selling points for long hair. also, sometimes, a super early morning might warrant a bath the night before so i have have 30 more minutes to devote to getting 4 kids out the door. as we discussed the article i realized that i have never ever suffered the blahs of motherhood due to the fact that i feel lost as a person. it made me feel glad that the anchor i held onto as a person has been what has kept me together as a mother. it made me feel less guilty for the things i am not great at (such as having a spotless house all the time, or volunteering at every one of my kids endeavors to name a few)..
i love those moments when we discover strength in the thick of thin things! it was such a good feeling!!
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
aging bi-polar style
tomorrow my sweet red head turns 33. tonight i remarked that i feel 40. 4 kids, a house, a good job. that's where most 40 year olds fall into the spectrum of accomplishments and maturity, right? i mean, monday scott is taking the boards to renew his license to practice medicine which means we have been out of school as long as we were in school. six years. yes, the maturity of a 40 year old i tell you.
now, a few things of note have happened around here lately that must be known to the blogging world. first off. i took my children to a bakery for some fresh bagels. because of the aforementioned blessing of being out of school for six years, we can afford a nice bakery fresh bagel. when we got in there, the soup smelled good and the kids talked me into dinner. scott was still in the operating room, so i figured this would be ok, he might be a while. it was around the five o'clock hour which is a wind that blows no good if you're ella. she had a melt down 15 minutes in because i would not let her carry the tray with four bowls of soup. the family next to us was quite taken in with our dramatic unfolding. it was an older couple with an adult child. a few minutes into the tantrum the woman came over to try to console ella. i was appreciative but unfortunately ella is incredibly shy and someone else nosing in her business makes a situation even more unbearable. after being stared at by this family for thirty minutes, the mother finally approached me. she apologetically described their plight. they thought i was the big sister who had just got her license and decided to take her siblings out for dinner. she was shocked to hear the kids call me mom. i was quite taken aback. i told her after carrying four children, i would like to look like it. i earned every wrinkle and fold. easton told me that this mistake was made because i am a little person. i quipped that it was only because grayce is almost as tall as me, it takes me down a bit in the credibility department. i would also like to give this family credit. i would be staring too if a 16 year old took our four little kids to dinner. gold medal.
only a few days later, we were lunching with my kids and mother at the greenery. the waitress was quite shocked to learn i was the mother. this is a compliment to my 50 something year old mother as she must have thought my mom was the mother of all five of us mckay's. my mom pinned it down to the braid in my hair, it takes ten years off she said. this makes me reconsider this whole long hair thing.
on the opposite end, last week a neighbor was quite shocked to hear that we had just entered our thirties. their associations with us entail a religious setting and a professional setting. all ages go out the door in that case. seriously. scott has an app on his phone that tells all the ages of people in our religious congregation and sometimes, not often, we may or may not be known to play, guess their age. and when you know someone in a religious setting, age flies right on out of the reasonable department. you know people by job, service given, visits done, lessons taught. so it is rather entertaining to us when we are off by 20 years with some folks. and an age upgrade in a religious setting is a compliment. if i think you are 60 and you are really only 45, well, it's because i think you're closer to dying because you are so righteous. really. that's how i rate it. so i guess i should be complimented that she thought we were in our 40's, right up there with her and her almost 50 year old husband. whew.
the point of this post is to tell my good husband, that he's 95 in my book. he's good. he makes me better. i feel like most days i am being dragged along on his ride. and it is a good, wonderful ride. cheers scotty.
now, a few things of note have happened around here lately that must be known to the blogging world. first off. i took my children to a bakery for some fresh bagels. because of the aforementioned blessing of being out of school for six years, we can afford a nice bakery fresh bagel. when we got in there, the soup smelled good and the kids talked me into dinner. scott was still in the operating room, so i figured this would be ok, he might be a while. it was around the five o'clock hour which is a wind that blows no good if you're ella. she had a melt down 15 minutes in because i would not let her carry the tray with four bowls of soup. the family next to us was quite taken in with our dramatic unfolding. it was an older couple with an adult child. a few minutes into the tantrum the woman came over to try to console ella. i was appreciative but unfortunately ella is incredibly shy and someone else nosing in her business makes a situation even more unbearable. after being stared at by this family for thirty minutes, the mother finally approached me. she apologetically described their plight. they thought i was the big sister who had just got her license and decided to take her siblings out for dinner. she was shocked to hear the kids call me mom. i was quite taken aback. i told her after carrying four children, i would like to look like it. i earned every wrinkle and fold. easton told me that this mistake was made because i am a little person. i quipped that it was only because grayce is almost as tall as me, it takes me down a bit in the credibility department. i would also like to give this family credit. i would be staring too if a 16 year old took our four little kids to dinner. gold medal.
only a few days later, we were lunching with my kids and mother at the greenery. the waitress was quite shocked to learn i was the mother. this is a compliment to my 50 something year old mother as she must have thought my mom was the mother of all five of us mckay's. my mom pinned it down to the braid in my hair, it takes ten years off she said. this makes me reconsider this whole long hair thing.
on the opposite end, last week a neighbor was quite shocked to hear that we had just entered our thirties. their associations with us entail a religious setting and a professional setting. all ages go out the door in that case. seriously. scott has an app on his phone that tells all the ages of people in our religious congregation and sometimes, not often, we may or may not be known to play, guess their age. and when you know someone in a religious setting, age flies right on out of the reasonable department. you know people by job, service given, visits done, lessons taught. so it is rather entertaining to us when we are off by 20 years with some folks. and an age upgrade in a religious setting is a compliment. if i think you are 60 and you are really only 45, well, it's because i think you're closer to dying because you are so righteous. really. that's how i rate it. so i guess i should be complimented that she thought we were in our 40's, right up there with her and her almost 50 year old husband. whew.
the point of this post is to tell my good husband, that he's 95 in my book. he's good. he makes me better. i feel like most days i am being dragged along on his ride. and it is a good, wonderful ride. cheers scotty.
Monday, February 6, 2012
january.....finally over.
january started ever so lovely. walks to see the animals and bee hives everyday. sunshine. warm weather and spring longing. and then.......
and then my baby got it. i have never cried so hard for a baby. almost admitted twice. he lost three precious pounds. believe it or not, he is under weight. he is barely hanging on the charts, and every ounce lost was one we worked so hard for. he tried to stay happy, but sometimes had to crash where ever he landed.
and of course, the first night he slept for about 4 hours straight, ella woke up with a good old fashioned cold. i made them blow kisses from afar to no avail. he caught her love. that didn't stop a mandatory tea party to try out rowan's gluten free, dairy free, soy free, nut free (did i get them all?) treats. they thoroughly enjoyed them.
and today, with a fresh new haircut, he was up to his old antics. just in time for a miserable bout of "you're getting a new tooth and can't keep anything in". sigh. please bless the stroller in that box he's playing with makes up for our miserable month. it is the joovy sit n stand to be used in disneyland for a mckay cousin vacation. just the thought of a week away got me thru the gloomy month.oh wait, and that cute face!!!!!
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
a few items of note...
i have been reluctant to finish the recap on the trip to NYC because i don't want it to be over. i kind of like having something to hang on to. but then i have a bunch of useless/interesting facts that i need to blog about.
even tho the weather is warm, we have gladly held the sick and afflicted torch high. someone is always down with something. i am pretty sure rowan had chicken pox a few weeks ago, but he also has been covered in molluscum since we went to the magic kingdom last march, so i passed it off as another brutal attack of this wart family virus that lasts up to 18 months. as i talked to the doctor today, he confirmed, it probably was the pox. he has had every little thing the kids have had, plus we have discovered allergies to nuts and dairy. yay for me. we get to make a visit to primary children's at the end of the month. it took us six weeks of crying it out at nights to sleep train him(we go in at 5,10,15, and 20 minute intervals as suggested by our pediatrician). my pediatrician said we both deserved large medals. he also reassured me that although his weight has dipped significantly, there is plenty of fat to keep the worry at bay.
{this is my baby sporting his love of candy canes}
ella marched down the stairs rather sluggishly this morning and announced that she was sick. when i asked what was wrong, she said she felt like an old lady. that would indeed give merit to body aches.
i have a sinus something or other without any runny nose. i am dizzy as can be with pains in my sinuses. i do the netti pot and find some relief. it is so strange.
easton turned the ripe age of eight a few weeks ago. he is going to be baptized saturday and also went to his first boy scout meeting. i have never seen a boy so proud of a bird feeder. he also got sick halfway thru his birthday party. he decided every friend within a 10 mile radius should come cheer for the wildcats with him. after all, they are sporting the number one point guard in college ball in the nation. we feel lucky to have season tickets, go WSU. anyway, halfway thru a piece of pizza he was sure he was going to loose that piece to the dreaded and much circulated stomach bug. good news, it was over after a day of body aches and NO vomit. happy birthday buddy.
also, rowan has thrush and easton fell down the stairs the other day. the all wood stairs that scott fell down last year and i laughed myself into a vomiting fit. i did not laugh at easton. and grayce was home today with an achy something or other that i am sure we will recycle 4 or 5 times before valentines day.
the good part about being a mother now for ten years is that i get to enjoy this refining fire. vomit doesn't put the fear of god into me like it used to. it's part of this stage of life. it's going to happen. ella has needed only one round of oral steroids,breathing treatments, antibiotics this season. compare that to four years ago when it was EVERY SINGLE MONTH and i can see the light at the end of the tunnel. the end of the tunnel has tulips, and sunshine.
there you have it. a post of useless/interesting information about our winter cold/flu season.
even tho the weather is warm, we have gladly held the sick and afflicted torch high. someone is always down with something. i am pretty sure rowan had chicken pox a few weeks ago, but he also has been covered in molluscum since we went to the magic kingdom last march, so i passed it off as another brutal attack of this wart family virus that lasts up to 18 months. as i talked to the doctor today, he confirmed, it probably was the pox. he has had every little thing the kids have had, plus we have discovered allergies to nuts and dairy. yay for me. we get to make a visit to primary children's at the end of the month. it took us six weeks of crying it out at nights to sleep train him(we go in at 5,10,15, and 20 minute intervals as suggested by our pediatrician). my pediatrician said we both deserved large medals. he also reassured me that although his weight has dipped significantly, there is plenty of fat to keep the worry at bay.
{this is my baby sporting his love of candy canes}
ella marched down the stairs rather sluggishly this morning and announced that she was sick. when i asked what was wrong, she said she felt like an old lady. that would indeed give merit to body aches.
i have a sinus something or other without any runny nose. i am dizzy as can be with pains in my sinuses. i do the netti pot and find some relief. it is so strange.
easton turned the ripe age of eight a few weeks ago. he is going to be baptized saturday and also went to his first boy scout meeting. i have never seen a boy so proud of a bird feeder. he also got sick halfway thru his birthday party. he decided every friend within a 10 mile radius should come cheer for the wildcats with him. after all, they are sporting the number one point guard in college ball in the nation. we feel lucky to have season tickets, go WSU. anyway, halfway thru a piece of pizza he was sure he was going to loose that piece to the dreaded and much circulated stomach bug. good news, it was over after a day of body aches and NO vomit. happy birthday buddy.
also, rowan has thrush and easton fell down the stairs the other day. the all wood stairs that scott fell down last year and i laughed myself into a vomiting fit. i did not laugh at easton. and grayce was home today with an achy something or other that i am sure we will recycle 4 or 5 times before valentines day.
the good part about being a mother now for ten years is that i get to enjoy this refining fire. vomit doesn't put the fear of god into me like it used to. it's part of this stage of life. it's going to happen. ella has needed only one round of oral steroids,breathing treatments, antibiotics this season. compare that to four years ago when it was EVERY SINGLE MONTH and i can see the light at the end of the tunnel. the end of the tunnel has tulips, and sunshine.
there you have it. a post of useless/interesting information about our winter cold/flu season.
Thursday, December 29, 2011
day three, just when you thought i forgot...
day three was filled with sleeping as our late night meatballs kept us out for two days technically. i was bound and determined to eat at the clinton street bakery this day and have blueberry pancakes. determined. it started off by some wrong subway stops on my part, and then the lazy afternoon got the better of us. we couldn't hail a cab if our lives depended on it and so, we decided that a cuban sandwich and corn elote was just what we needed. this meal took us thru the most quaint parts of SOHO. it was full of street fairs and beautiful shops. the walk would have been better with full bellies, BUT the first bite was worth it. i have never had corn like that. i don't know what kind of corn they used but it was meaty and had such a deep flavor. the cuban sandwich was other planet fall apart in your mouth. as you can see below, we opted for the walk up window at cafe habana as the wait in the shop was crazy. we found ourselves a small bench and made enough nummy noises to turn your cheeks red. oh.momma. don't miss this place. it was so so amazing. shout out to my friend erin who insisted that we go here.
i never wondered one spec about it until i saw it. where do you get gas in the big apple? everyone goes here apparently. it was the only gas station i saw in the heart of the city.
this was at a lego shop at the rock. every little round pod was filled with a different color of lego. easton would have wet hit pants on upon entry.
right outside of the lego shop we saw this beautiful lettuce. like i took 50 pictures pretty. i instantly thought of emily ballard. maybe sonora grill could have this as a plant stand outside the restaurant in the summer eh?
while riding on the subway uptown, there was an older woman and her niece that kept pointing and whispering. they finally approached me and told me i looked like julianna margulies. being a proud ER viewer for years, i was highly complimented, and then highly humored. she has some nappy curly hair. this further supports my claim of my hair getting bigger and bigger with each passing hour in this humidity hubble. the cute pair pointed us in the direction of the american doll store. after the lettuce watching, we headed over to the doll store and fell in love. it was story upon story of every doll detail you could imagine. angela was in heaven and talked mindy into buying a doll for her daughter. it was so fun.this day was our most mild in the city. the walk thru soho was my favorite and that food. the corn and sandwich top my to do again before i die list.
this iconic figure is so pretty at night!
while riding on the subway uptown, there was an older woman and her niece that kept pointing and whispering. they finally approached me and told me i looked like julianna margulies. being a proud ER viewer for years, i was highly complimented, and then highly humored. she has some nappy curly hair. this further supports my claim of my hair getting bigger and bigger with each passing hour in this humidity hubble. the cute pair pointed us in the direction of the american doll store. after the lettuce watching, we headed over to the doll store and fell in love. it was story upon story of every doll detail you could imagine. angela was in heaven and talked mindy into buying a doll for her daughter. it was so fun.this day was our most mild in the city. the walk thru soho was my favorite and that food. the corn and sandwich top my to do again before i die list.
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
day two
after seeing what a few hours in the big city will do to you, we decided to take before and after pictures. this is our before. mindy and i on the left and taleese and angela on the right.
this was on our train ride in, it was a perfect foggy, rainy, humid new york day and it was our longest day in the city. we left around elevenish and didn't roll in until three a.m. shh, don't tell my mutha.
we went to the flat iron district to eat as we felt it was appropriate as that is where the infamy of the shake shack began. it was a good 45 minute wait but completely worth it.
the picture above on the left is where we caught our cab to go see the torch of freedom. we met up with a classy cab driver that was majoring in micro biology hoping to pursue a phd. the cabby's were one of the highlights of the trip. this one told us of his family coming from the middle east to live here and how he has driven cabs for 7 years. he told us how he is working on a book called "crown victoria" that would catalogue all of his adventures in his yellow wheels. at this point taleese developed some questions she liked to ask all of our drivers. have you ever had a gun pulled on you? what is the craziest thing you have ever seen? how long have you been driving cabs? how long have you lived in america.? most cabby's had never heard of utah. they didn't even know if it was in the US.
after that pleasant cab drive we found ourselves at battery park ready to view the statue.
i warned the nyc virgins that lady liberty could be quite disappointing. it wasn't a large towering figure tv makes it out to be. like in this picture below, it kind of proves the point that it could easily be missed.
it gets a wee bit better in the second picture but for whatever reason, we only ended up paying homage for five minutes. we were easily distracted and ventured up to ground zero next. the first time i was at ground zero, they were still cleaning up. it was in 2004 and everything was still quite fresh. because occupy wallstreet was only a few blocks away, ground zero was completely in tarps (streets and all) because protesters were threatening to occupy the park there citing lack of TV coverage. (seriously?) it was another disappointing thing because NOTHING could be seen. we meandered over to the craziness of the protest and were really unimpressed. the gathering was not worth all the attention it garnered to say nothing of the purpose. stupidity.
we then entered the subway with throngs of other people as we were getting a taste of NYC rain. there was a huge line to buy an MTA card, and we were stuffed underground like sardines. the trip was hitting a bit of a prozac moment but once we got on that subway all was well.
from wallstreet we hit canal street and little italy. because of the rain, canal street was a ghost town (can you imagine?) we didn't get snagged by one single asian to buy prada, gucchi, dolce cabana. we DID however make time to take a bite of a cannoli in little italy. it was so fantastic and i can still taste that sweet marscapone and ricotta cheese in that crackling chocolate shell!
we wandered 5th avenue for a while and i introduced the girls to H&M. we strolled around a bit and then felt the panic of a tourist as we realized we hadn't used the bathroom and not every store has a facility. we were directed to bloomingdales, and oh, honey. i have never had a retail experience like that. i can't give it justice to walk in to hundreds of sales people trying to sell you a purse for $10,000, or sunglasses for $5,000. it was wild. we finally accomplished our bathroom mission after 4 flights of stairs and two lovely bathroom attendants who directed us to some beautiful potties. i mean purdy. they had some lovely couches that we rested on. we found ourselves in quite the pickle as we sat down next to a sleeping homeless woman. she was aged with a large brimmed black sun hat, bright red lipstick, and her little cart. we noticed that she had a hospital band on but that was quickly forgotten as she snored so loud it could have brought the four levels down to dust. she would go quite some time in between breaths, and we had to pry nurse taleese from taking her pulse. taleese assured us that we were witnessing death right then and there in bloomingdale's in the fancy bathroom with attendants. i am a little ashamed to say i took a picture of her. it was quite the scene, i won't post it but i won't soon forget it. so so sad.
while we headed out to the gershwin theater, magnolia bakery caught our eye. it was not on our list of treats or bakeries to visit as we had been assured there were much better cupcakes to be had, but there was no line. good thing we caught something because we didn't end up visiting any other bakery. too many choices and not enough belly space.
magnolia bakery was okay. it was a five minute wait cupcake and i wouldn't have waited a second more for it without feeling jipped.
the highlight of our day was going to see WICKED. i opted for some cheap seats labeled "obstructed" and we scored a pretty awesome view by taking that chance. it was on the end of the isle, but on the floor. it was such an amazing production. the music, the people. it made my heart ache for grayce as i know she would have been smitten. one day i will get her there in the theater district and we will view to our hearts content!
after the theater we hit times square and i am amazed how this city never sleeps. at right around eleven o'clock that place was more alive then most towns at noon. we decided that we were hungry and we NEEDED meatballs. off to the meatball shop we headed. well, it was the meatball that almost never happened. it took us a ridiculous amount of time to hail the cab and by the time we did we scored a lovely toyota sienna minivan. this was likely the craziest cab ride we took. i found that the art to calmly arriving to your destination without heart failure was to not look out your window. that wasn't hard as these crazies drive 90 miles and hour and you really can't see a darn thing anyway. but, as taleese and i were both looking out the window at the truck that almost killed us, our heads ended up slamming the seat in front of us. unfortunately mine was plexiglass. the driver stopped and turned around making sure my body was still attached. lucky for me the adrenaline was flowing so freely i could only laugh hysterically about my near death experience. we finally arrived at the meatball shop and found that at midnight the wait was forty five minutes. we did what any other respectable mormon girls would do and bellied up to the bar to drink some water where there was no wait. i am sure that thrilled the bartender to have four temple recommends sitting across from him. we assured him that water drinkers tipped just as well as the drunks next to us and we only needed meatballs.
taleese here is trying to tell you how off the hook her dish was. she made friends with a dishwasher on his break and got a tip about the best dish. all i know is that i couldn't keep my fork off her plate. it was some creamy noodle with a large meatball the size of my bruised head. it was crazy good.
these are our after pictures. at two in the morning i'd say we held up well. mindy was only just beginning for the day. (she thrives at night).
i on the other hand was out of my darn mind and convinced them to take a picture of my steve tyler face. if i ever have my nose done and my face lifted, this is what i will look like.
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