Saturday, September 11, 2010


the last few weeks always feel like one long labor for me. i am one of those women who get to the day they are being started and the nurse exclaims, oh my, you are a five and 90 percent effaced. yes, i know, i have been for a few months now. i don't know why it happens to some and not to others. i envy the girl that says she is so desperate for a contraction she will often mistake gas for a contraction.

my sweet red head has taken away the labor including activities around the house for the health of my back and for the health of our child. but, yesterday the floors were so dirty. it had been a week since their last scrubbing. i had to do it. i filled up my rainbow vacuum with water, pulled out the floor attachment and went to work. 4 hours later the floors to this abode were picked up and steamed sparkly clean. unfortunately, it caused me to be on all fours with some intense back labor and contractions. while on all fours rocking back and forth, i was telling scott that i really didn't want to go into labor so soon, what was i thinking. the poor kids all looked wide eyed as they all took a chance to sneak upstairs and peek in on the 3 month labor that takes place in my body. ella was quite curious at the whole situation. she was immediately sympathetic and started rubbing my back. she didn't know it hurt to have a baby. she then proceeded to rub the upper part of my body, or the parts in which she lovingly refers to as the nursies. she has been astonished and quite curious with these body parts the past 8 months. she is quite sure there is another baby in one of those she often states publicly. anyone who knows me knows that i am the epitome of private and modest. to demonstrate this point i will call upon grayce's comment last month.

she out loud wondered when she would ever see a pregnant man. of course i laughed a chain smoker laugh that caused a scene of dry heaving laughter. then i felt guilty that the only biology talk i have ever given her includes guarding her private body parts to the tune of kicking and screaming. the talk has to come soon, i know. fourth grade will all too soon be over and i am sure many questions will be asked. pretty soon, i think the county comes along and makes an afternoon date of it at the school. why, i have always explained to the little babes at my house that the doctor simply untwists my belly button and viola! a baby comes out. the kids most willingly believe this because well, my belly button becomes quite the outtie when i am in this swollen state.

a few more weeks. if i go to the first of october, i will be thrilled. my ultra super duper fertilizer amniotic fluid has kicked in and the baby is suddenly measuring 2 weeks ahead. i had a dream last night that a cute dark haired, chubby cheeked baby slid right out of a water slide into my arms in a hospital room. it was the best labor i ever had. maybe that is how i will take on explaining the biology works of babies to my little ones. one big water slide from heaven. what a great idea, certainly my cheeks would be a much lighter shade of crimson.......

and these are just for you maryann! i ran into a good friend at the store last week and she said she read my blog and it was in need of pictures. i agreed and then remembered there is a reason, we are horrid picture takers at this house! this is me 6 months along at the beach seeking shade under the hatch.

and here at the last mac brothers wedding, four months pregnant with number 4 and further testament that pictures are a failure here. i can't get the picture to turn, boo.