last month the topic of discussion for the power of mom's learning circle was pertaining to that cute, fun, girl that sometimes gets stifled by the busyness of motherhood.
it was a really interesting discussion. the topic brought out opinions that were so varied from the different stages we were all in with our present mothering situation. the bottom line was that at some point in the journey of motherhood, usually when change comes, something often times is sacrificed. whether it be a routine for getting ready for the day, cleaning, a social life, or the continual desire to educate our minds.
every person sacrifices something for motherhood. there has to be something given up when heaven's windows are opened. it was interesting to me that it is usually something that requires a mother ample opportunity to be humbled.
i have had many situations as a mother that have humbled me right into next year. one thing that has been my anchor for not loosing myself in the insanity motherhood offers is giving myself, husband, and kids a showered, made up self EVERY.DAY.POSSIBLE.
if you come to my house and see me in my pajamas unshowered after 12pm, please call the relief society to bring me dinner. DONT call the relief society if my house is cluttered or my kids don't have the latest fashion trends. DO call the relief society if my kids have eaten processed food for a week straight.
there are things i have to have to function as a mother everyday that differ vastly from another. i do feel blessed that my mother put her best foot forward everyday by never being caught in pajamas at dinner time. she got up everyday and gave herself the gift of putting herself together. that one principle has kept me in tact as a mother. my first task with babies is to figure out how to shower in the morning while they are safely kept. with my first one it meant bringing in the car seat to the bathroom while i could still see baby and had that shower every morning and took the time to get ready. with my fourth it meant putting together a little bathroom basket with things he can pull out and play with while i am showering and can still see him. they become part of the routine and can see it is important to me. all my kids have learned to respect it and follow suite themselves, giving themselves the opportunity to spend some time gaining momentum and confidence for the day by honoring this ritual. there is no sink of dishes too big, or errand so important that it will win over giving myself that time to get made up and get it together. i can enter the rest of my day with confidence and pride in the time i invested in me.
i have had to make some compromises on days when the tasks begin early. in the past two years i have come to be okay with washing my long hair every other day. it drove me to insanity the first few months i did it, but it has slowly become routine and one of the selling points for long hair. also, sometimes, a super early morning might warrant a bath the night before so i have have 30 more minutes to devote to getting 4 kids out the door. as we discussed the article i realized that i have never ever suffered the blahs of motherhood due to the fact that i feel lost as a person. it made me feel glad that the anchor i held onto as a person has been what has kept me together as a mother. it made me feel less guilty for the things i am not great at (such as having a spotless house all the time, or volunteering at every one of my kids endeavors to name a few)..
i love those moments when we discover strength in the thick of thin things! it was such a good feeling!!
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3 comments:
That was so interesting to see what each person had to hold onto to maintain their sanity. Someday you're going to be like Sherry and need to go to the gym every single day. Or maybe someday I can talk you into going to the gym just once :)
Don't let Emily trick you into going to the gym. I let my guard down one time and now I am signed up for 2 races and can't even think I am so sore. See how I still use 2 spaces after a period:) Anyway, I love that you LOVE being a mother so much. You are amazing & real!
What the heck?! You used to wash your hair EVERY SINGLE DAY?!?! I can't imagine washing my hair everyday. Of course, my hair is that dry, naturally curly/frizzy kind of hair, and your hair is that beautiful thick and shiny kind, so I suppose that is a big difference in terms of how soon it needs to be washed. Anyway. Hooray for motherhood. Miss you.
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